I had a conference at the Paper Valley Hotel in downtown Appleton this week. The Outagamie County courthouse is a few blocks away from the hotel and being down there brought back a ton of memories of my dad's trial almost 2 years ago. I was hoping the memories would fade by now but they haven't. I skipped out of the lunch presentation the first day and walked to the church where we spent most of the almost 9 hours of the jury deliberations. We lit a candle and prayed to Mary, prayed in the pews, and sat in a meeting room off the church and listened to someone practice the organ and the choir practice. Someone brought us a tray of food to snack on while we waited. Around 5pm Kristin, Tom, Mike and I walked to the Paper Valley to get coffee from the Starbucks there. It was pouring on our way back and we tried to run carrying these coffees. Around 7:30pm or so I started to really lose it. I begged Mike to let us get a room at the Paper Valley so we could lay down, warm up, and I could get out of the damn dress clothes I'd been wearing all day. He never said no, just always tried to distract me. Around 8:00pm we went to our car so I could recline the seat back and crank up the heat. He talked to his dad on the cell phone. Around 8:45 pm we decided to go back into the courthouse and when we walked in, the court clerk told us "the verdict is in." I called Kristin and the next 15 minutes were the longest of my life. I'll never forget rocking back and forth and saying "please God" over and over as the jury filed in. The other day I went back to that church, prayed in the same places we did, and walked around the meeting room. I walked by the courthouse. I hope these memories will fade someday.
On to some good stuff. I've had a fun couple of days! Thursday night I went out with some friends to Margarita's...yum-o. Friday night I went to Jason Michael Carroll with some other friends to the Brown County Fair. It was FREEZING but we had a blast! Yesterday we went to the zoo with Kristin, Tom and Dylan and then went back to their house for a cookout. After supper Kristin and I took the kids out for what I call the Walk of Death. They live in a subdivision right off of a county highway and they are the first house in the subdivision. It's a nice house but the location blows. So we walk on this super busy county highway to a country road for a half hour. We had to keep crossing the road when traffic was coming our way but then we'd have to cross again. People were blowing by us at 60 mph and I was freaked out the whole time. Kristin wanted to do a "power walk" which I knew had bad written all over it. She was one step away from a full out sprint. I could hardly keep up and finally on the way back I didn't even try. I was at least 20 feet behind her. My house may be in a ghetto looking neighborhood (it's really not, the houses are just older) but I can walk in the middle of the road and see maybe 2 cars in a half hour walk.
I didn't have IUI this month. I had an ultrasound on day 11 and I had something on my ovary that was either an unusually large follicle or a cyst. Dr. O'Toole was leaning more towards cyst so no IUI. I was honestly thinking cyst too because on days 8-10 I was all bloated, crampy, feeling tons of pressure, etc. So if I get my period this month (which I think I will, Mike was driving me NUTS yesterday meaning I'm feeling PMS-y), I'll have another ultrasound on days 1,2 or 3 of the next cycle to see if the cyst is still there. If it is, no clomid. If not, clomid this month and possibly an injection to force ovulation. I think I've decided that I'll do this for 6 months and then be done with it. Our insurance covers the insemination process itself but not the lab charges to wash Mike's swimmers. That's about $300. I think I'm getting to a place where I'm ok with Paige being an only child. It dawned on me not too long ago that she has never ONCE asked for a baby brother or sister. There's lots of reasons why I'm starting to feel like this but I honestly don't feel like going into it right now.
I have more to say but I don't feel like typing anymore. Stay tuned dear readers.
Sunday, August 23, 2009
Friday, July 31, 2009
The Ol' One Two Punch
Nope not pregnant this month. On Tuesday morning I took a pregnancy test and it was negative. My stupid period didn't start until Thursday which technically made me a day or two late. So for two days I kept thinking, well maybe I tested too early, maybe I'm one of those unusual ones that gets a negative pee test, but positive blood test, blah blah blah. Oh no. I woke up Thursday morning and there it was.
To top off my sadness, I stopped at the Humane Society Thursday afternoon because they had a dog that they put in our paper last week that I absolutely fell in love in with. She was a golden retreiver mix. Mike and I talked about it for a little bit but never really decided. So since I was sad on Thursday I decided to stop in and see if this dog could cheer me up. Well someone put in a really good application on her and she's probably adopted out by now. Good for her, sad for me. So I'm looking at petfinder.com for little dogs that are good with kids but Mike is not on board with getting another dog. I figure if I can't have another baby, I'll get another dog. Maybe I'll turn into an animal hoarder.
In good news, I'm down 20 pounds! Yay me! However I stayed the same this past week and I'm afraid I won't go down much next week. I'm an emotional eater and I'm eating stuff I shouldn't be.
Tomorrow is the first day of August already. Yikes. Gotta get the kid some school supplies pretty soon. My baby will be in kindergarden....so weird.
To top off my sadness, I stopped at the Humane Society Thursday afternoon because they had a dog that they put in our paper last week that I absolutely fell in love in with. She was a golden retreiver mix. Mike and I talked about it for a little bit but never really decided. So since I was sad on Thursday I decided to stop in and see if this dog could cheer me up. Well someone put in a really good application on her and she's probably adopted out by now. Good for her, sad for me. So I'm looking at petfinder.com for little dogs that are good with kids but Mike is not on board with getting another dog. I figure if I can't have another baby, I'll get another dog. Maybe I'll turn into an animal hoarder.
In good news, I'm down 20 pounds! Yay me! However I stayed the same this past week and I'm afraid I won't go down much next week. I'm an emotional eater and I'm eating stuff I shouldn't be.
Tomorrow is the first day of August already. Yikes. Gotta get the kid some school supplies pretty soon. My baby will be in kindergarden....so weird.
Thursday, July 23, 2009
I Really Am A Judgemental Bitch
This should come as no surprise to you, but allow me to confirm. Today I'm perusing different car seat websites to see what new high weight harness seats are out there so I can update my work list that hasn't been updated, in oh, over a year. So I stumble onto this website with message boards that people can post questions, reviews, etc. It's mostly women and their signatures are out of control! I must share with you.
J, mommy to C 7yrs, 52" 46lb Harnessed in a Regent w/mom, PW w/Dad and Gma, E 4yrs, RF'd to 3yrs 35lbs in an EFTA, now 41" 40lb, harnessed with mom & dad in a Nauti, Vivo w/ Gma
C, SAHM to J age 5.6yrs, 43" overall, 17" torso in a SK Monterey (2004 Chevy Impala) and Britax Regent (2005 Honda Accord)
DD2 - 3.5yr, 41", 33lb, RF in a Lauren BV/Cowmoo MA/Olivia MA (with a tiara & ponytail on her head in the pic - she just fits rf)DS2 - 22 mo, 32", 25lb, RF in a Aqua BV/FPSVD/Odyssey DCDD1 & DS1 safely using adult seat belts (12 yrs & 10 yrs)
Me & DH FF'ing in seatbeltsDS 6/04 Harnessed, FFing in a Graco Nautilus/Matrix (in a 2004 Toyota Matrix) and a Radian 65/Champagne in a 1999 Mazda 626.
W, mommy to P, (7/26/02, 45.5", 40#)2004 Audi A4: Parkway, 2001 Nissan Xterra: NautilusTravel/Occasional Needs: RSTVAnd a little girl to be going into a True Fit Premiere, 9/19/09
DS1 4.5 yo - 35 lb (40.5") - FF in 2Radians/TrueFit/Traditions/CowmooMADS2 20 mo - 24 lb (30") - RF in 2AOEs/2Sceneras/MarathonAlso in possession of an outgrown Graco SafeSeat, a spare EFChase and 2 Clek Otos, just because...
I can decipher most of them, but seriously? Car seats save lives, I get that. But seriously, these women must sit on the computer all day and just wait for a question. As soon as one is asked, at least 5 pounce on it and repeat what the other said. It's quite humorous.
On my mom's group message board there is this big ass discussion about public vs. private schools and some of the comments have really rubbed me the wrong way. Alot of "I heard this, I heard that." Some are totally bashing East High, and while I at first bought into the bad school rap that East has, I've come around. Everyone is going to think some school is bad because of something they heard from one or two people. Some are dissing private schools. WTF?!?!?
Yesterday I had someone walk in unannounced for a car seat. I told our secretary to have him call me when he gets home because I HATE WALK INS with a passion. I ended up meeting with him and as I walked out to our lobby, he was talking with one of our Child Protective Service workers, then as I was making the appointment with him, one of our Economic Support workers came out to meet with him about food stamps. It was like one stop shopping for him. How fun. He was actually a pretty nice guy and I felt bad for being such a judgemental bitch (see I have feelings) so I went into my friend's office to tell her about this. We end up looking him up on our case management system and find out he was just discharged from Brown County Mental Health 2 days earlier. Yeah! I guess he was totally wasted and talking about how he was going to hurt himeself or someone else and then he refused follow up services after he was discharged. Good thing we take appointments in the same building as the police department.
So the appointment before him should be a good one too. I was checking my vmail messages with my friend in my office and all of a sudden she's like OMG that's the chick I've been trying to get a hold of! This chick, A, we'll call her, has 3 kids and knowingly moved into a lead filled duplex before the landlord could get the lead taken care of. A lied to my friend and said she had her kids tested for lead, then also told her landlord the kids were tested, their results were normal and my friend said it was ok for her to live there. All lies! My friend keeps calling her, but A won't answer. So she has a 10 month old baby crawling around in a lead infested apartment and won't do a damn thing about it. Oh yeah and she's getting a free car seat.
I am so sick of our fucked up system.
J, mommy to C 7yrs, 52" 46lb Harnessed in a Regent w/mom, PW w/Dad and Gma, E 4yrs, RF'd to 3yrs 35lbs in an EFTA, now 41" 40lb, harnessed with mom & dad in a Nauti, Vivo w/ Gma
C, SAHM to J age 5.6yrs, 43" overall, 17" torso in a SK Monterey (2004 Chevy Impala) and Britax Regent (2005 Honda Accord)
DD2 - 3.5yr, 41", 33lb, RF in a Lauren BV/Cowmoo MA/Olivia MA (with a tiara & ponytail on her head in the pic - she just fits rf)DS2 - 22 mo, 32", 25lb, RF in a Aqua BV/FPSVD/Odyssey DCDD1 & DS1 safely using adult seat belts (12 yrs & 10 yrs)
Me & DH FF'ing in seatbeltsDS 6/04 Harnessed, FFing in a Graco Nautilus/Matrix (in a 2004 Toyota Matrix) and a Radian 65/Champagne in a 1999 Mazda 626.
W, mommy to P, (7/26/02, 45.5", 40#)2004 Audi A4: Parkway, 2001 Nissan Xterra: NautilusTravel/Occasional Needs: RSTVAnd a little girl to be going into a True Fit Premiere, 9/19/09
DS1 4.5 yo - 35 lb (40.5") - FF in 2Radians/TrueFit/Traditions/CowmooMADS2 20 mo - 24 lb (30") - RF in 2AOEs/2Sceneras/MarathonAlso in possession of an outgrown Graco SafeSeat, a spare EFChase and 2 Clek Otos, just because...
I can decipher most of them, but seriously? Car seats save lives, I get that. But seriously, these women must sit on the computer all day and just wait for a question. As soon as one is asked, at least 5 pounce on it and repeat what the other said. It's quite humorous.
On my mom's group message board there is this big ass discussion about public vs. private schools and some of the comments have really rubbed me the wrong way. Alot of "I heard this, I heard that." Some are totally bashing East High, and while I at first bought into the bad school rap that East has, I've come around. Everyone is going to think some school is bad because of something they heard from one or two people. Some are dissing private schools. WTF?!?!?
Yesterday I had someone walk in unannounced for a car seat. I told our secretary to have him call me when he gets home because I HATE WALK INS with a passion. I ended up meeting with him and as I walked out to our lobby, he was talking with one of our Child Protective Service workers, then as I was making the appointment with him, one of our Economic Support workers came out to meet with him about food stamps. It was like one stop shopping for him. How fun. He was actually a pretty nice guy and I felt bad for being such a judgemental bitch (see I have feelings) so I went into my friend's office to tell her about this. We end up looking him up on our case management system and find out he was just discharged from Brown County Mental Health 2 days earlier. Yeah! I guess he was totally wasted and talking about how he was going to hurt himeself or someone else and then he refused follow up services after he was discharged. Good thing we take appointments in the same building as the police department.
So the appointment before him should be a good one too. I was checking my vmail messages with my friend in my office and all of a sudden she's like OMG that's the chick I've been trying to get a hold of! This chick, A, we'll call her, has 3 kids and knowingly moved into a lead filled duplex before the landlord could get the lead taken care of. A lied to my friend and said she had her kids tested for lead, then also told her landlord the kids were tested, their results were normal and my friend said it was ok for her to live there. All lies! My friend keeps calling her, but A won't answer. So she has a 10 month old baby crawling around in a lead infested apartment and won't do a damn thing about it. Oh yeah and she's getting a free car seat.
I am so sick of our fucked up system.
Tuesday, July 21, 2009
Boring
It's been a week and a half since my last blog entry. I really don't have much to say. I figure people are sick of me bitching about my pinkeye, but I'll just say a few more things about it. It. Sucked. The. Big. One. Last week Wednesday I went to an opthamologist because after a week my eye was still crusted shut in the morning. I had a 2pm apt. and was seen by Dr. Wonderful at 3:30pm. Super. He looked in my eyes for about 2 minutes, proclaimed he couldn't see discharge (um, what? So what's been crusting my eyes shut every morning for the past week?), said it may be viral, but he'll prescribe a new kind of drops anyway. Thank god, they worked. I'm now done with eye drops and my eye is back to normal.
Moving on.
So a summary of the past month. Kenny Chesney rocked! We had such a nice weekend away! Sugarland rocked too, and the fact that I got completely tanked probably added to the fun of the night. The Brewer game was a lot of fun too, we went with good friends, had great seats, and the Brewers won!
This past weekend, Mike, Paige and I went shopping, ran errands, etc. on Saturday morning. I was THIS CLOSE to leaving Paige at either Fleet Farm or Shopko. She was truly obnoxious. I got her 3 pairs of school shoes and 4 school shirts and she whined the whole time that "I NEVER get her anything!" Ugh. We went to a festival with the same friends we went to the Brewer game and their daughter Grace then went back to their house for supper. We love getting together with them because the girls disappear for hours and we can actually, you know, have adult conversations. It's a good thing. On Sunday I invited myself over to Melissa's house because her husband was working crappy hours. Paige was....weird and obnoxious again. I was ready to crawl in a hole when she told Melissa her living room was a mess. I think I liked her better when she didn't talk. Let's go back to that Paige. They have a big swingset and a trampoline but she found sitting on my lap or a patio chair much more entertaining. Came home and was actually productive around the house. Mike cleaned out the garage and I cleaned the house. Why I even bother to wash the floors I'm not sure. They're dirty already.
See, told ya this would be boring.
Moving on.
So a summary of the past month. Kenny Chesney rocked! We had such a nice weekend away! Sugarland rocked too, and the fact that I got completely tanked probably added to the fun of the night. The Brewer game was a lot of fun too, we went with good friends, had great seats, and the Brewers won!
This past weekend, Mike, Paige and I went shopping, ran errands, etc. on Saturday morning. I was THIS CLOSE to leaving Paige at either Fleet Farm or Shopko. She was truly obnoxious. I got her 3 pairs of school shoes and 4 school shirts and she whined the whole time that "I NEVER get her anything!" Ugh. We went to a festival with the same friends we went to the Brewer game and their daughter Grace then went back to their house for supper. We love getting together with them because the girls disappear for hours and we can actually, you know, have adult conversations. It's a good thing. On Sunday I invited myself over to Melissa's house because her husband was working crappy hours. Paige was....weird and obnoxious again. I was ready to crawl in a hole when she told Melissa her living room was a mess. I think I liked her better when she didn't talk. Let's go back to that Paige. They have a big swingset and a trampoline but she found sitting on my lap or a patio chair much more entertaining. Came home and was actually productive around the house. Mike cleaned out the garage and I cleaned the house. Why I even bother to wash the floors I'm not sure. They're dirty already.
See, told ya this would be boring.
Friday, July 10, 2009
Damn You Pinkeye!
Tuesday night I felt the telltale goop and weird filmy feeling in my left eye. Look in the mirror and PINKEYE. UGH!!!!! So I decide to save myself time and money and just use Paige's eye drops from 2 weeks ago since I have the exact same symptoms. Called the pharmacist on Wednesday and he agrees that's fine. So after 3 full days of playing outside with Paige in the sun with no contacts (=no sunglasses) and 3 mornings of my eye crusted shut I realize that my eye is not getting better. I go into Urgent Care tonight and the NP thinks that Paige's drops may have been contaminated and she gives me new ones. I hope they work quickly because this is so annoying. I hate waking up with crusted shut eyes. I hate driving with my sunglasses over my glasses and then squinting in the sun while we're at the park. GAH. I know this is minor shit, but it's super annoying.
So Paige "graduated" from Safety Town today. I'm so glad I signed her up and that I took the week off. She learned so much! I have to admit though that I felt like the country bumpkin in the big city. Or maybe more like a 14 year old trapped in a 33 year old mom's body. I easily had the crappiest car in the parking lot. I saw many a Lexus, Acadia, Volvo, etc. I was the only one who had just one kid. All the other moms were walking in at least 1-3 other kids. I would hold the door open for these moms and very few said thank you. As we passed in the hall, they wouldn't look at me, smile or say hi. I just think that's rude. I really got the impression that alot of these women thought their shit didn't stink. Maybe it was because I didn't do my hair, had hardly any make up on, and had a t shirt and knit shorts on. I am not a morning person, and didn't think I needed to get all prettied up to drop my kid off and run errands while she was gone.
I had a super heartbreaking moment today. As Amy and I were walking down the hall at the school, Paige grabbed Amy's 3 year old daughter's hand and walked with her down the hall holding her hand. It was just so dear. Brought tears to my eyes then and it does right now. She's meant to be a big sister, why can't it happen for us?
So Paige "graduated" from Safety Town today. I'm so glad I signed her up and that I took the week off. She learned so much! I have to admit though that I felt like the country bumpkin in the big city. Or maybe more like a 14 year old trapped in a 33 year old mom's body. I easily had the crappiest car in the parking lot. I saw many a Lexus, Acadia, Volvo, etc. I was the only one who had just one kid. All the other moms were walking in at least 1-3 other kids. I would hold the door open for these moms and very few said thank you. As we passed in the hall, they wouldn't look at me, smile or say hi. I just think that's rude. I really got the impression that alot of these women thought their shit didn't stink. Maybe it was because I didn't do my hair, had hardly any make up on, and had a t shirt and knit shorts on. I am not a morning person, and didn't think I needed to get all prettied up to drop my kid off and run errands while she was gone.
I had a super heartbreaking moment today. As Amy and I were walking down the hall at the school, Paige grabbed Amy's 3 year old daughter's hand and walked with her down the hall holding her hand. It was just so dear. Brought tears to my eyes then and it does right now. She's meant to be a big sister, why can't it happen for us?
Tuesday, July 07, 2009
SUCCESS!!!!
As of last week Wednesday, I'm down 15 pounds in 6 weeks! I weigh in tomorrow and I think I'm only down another pound. I didn't eat any JC food this past weekend and drank a few too many beers. Damn you MGDs for going down so smooth on Friday night. I haven't been feeling too hot the past few days and have had no appetite which I think helps. I have the weirdest symptoms, my stomach is a little off, I feel a little stuffed up, but the worst is how achey and tired I am. But since I haven't been feeling too hot, I haven't been able to exercise either. AGH!
Anyway, what I'm so jazzed about is that on Saturday we did some shopping and at Old Navy I tried on some stretchy pants a size smaller than I normally wear and THEY FIT!!!! YEAH!!!! I tried on a pair of jeans in a size smaller and while I could button and zip them, they were quite tight. I'd maybe wear them with a long shirt covering up my rear. But I didn't get them. I think they'll fit when I lose another 5 pounds. So that will be my reward when I lose 20 pounds all together.
Paige is going to Safety Town at Howe Elementary in GB this week. I'm on vacation. I drop her off there around 9am, kill some time in GB then pick her up at noon. Yesterday we went to a park with my friend Amy and her kids, then today we went one of the libraries with Amy and Lisa and their kids for an arts and crafts thing for school age kids. They had a potter who made a couple of things on a wheel and then the kids got to make something with clay. Paige LOVED it! It has been so nice and relaxing and making me wish I could stay home. WTF?!?! Did I just say that? I know every day wouldn't be like this, but it has been fun to just bum around with her. If I wasn't feeling icky, I'd be enjoying our time together even more. Then I check my work email from home and see that we may have to take some unpaid days off this year yet to save the county money. I think this year it could be voluntary, but next year not. ARGH! Then someone in the union writes back is the county board going to cut down on travel? Are we going to make our board smaller? Are they going to take unpaid time for their meetings? Makes sense. I do like my job most days I just hate the county politics bullshit.
OK I just have to say this....everyone around me is getting pregnant!!!! It sucks!!!!! I'm taking Clomid right now and we'll do insemination the day after I get a positive ovulation predictor. It's exciting that I could get pregnant within a week or so, but what if it doesn't work the first time? How many times are we going to do this? Will we do IVF? Adoption?
Anyway, what I'm so jazzed about is that on Saturday we did some shopping and at Old Navy I tried on some stretchy pants a size smaller than I normally wear and THEY FIT!!!! YEAH!!!! I tried on a pair of jeans in a size smaller and while I could button and zip them, they were quite tight. I'd maybe wear them with a long shirt covering up my rear. But I didn't get them. I think they'll fit when I lose another 5 pounds. So that will be my reward when I lose 20 pounds all together.
Paige is going to Safety Town at Howe Elementary in GB this week. I'm on vacation. I drop her off there around 9am, kill some time in GB then pick her up at noon. Yesterday we went to a park with my friend Amy and her kids, then today we went one of the libraries with Amy and Lisa and their kids for an arts and crafts thing for school age kids. They had a potter who made a couple of things on a wheel and then the kids got to make something with clay. Paige LOVED it! It has been so nice and relaxing and making me wish I could stay home. WTF?!?! Did I just say that? I know every day wouldn't be like this, but it has been fun to just bum around with her. If I wasn't feeling icky, I'd be enjoying our time together even more. Then I check my work email from home and see that we may have to take some unpaid days off this year yet to save the county money. I think this year it could be voluntary, but next year not. ARGH! Then someone in the union writes back is the county board going to cut down on travel? Are we going to make our board smaller? Are they going to take unpaid time for their meetings? Makes sense. I do like my job most days I just hate the county politics bullshit.
OK I just have to say this....everyone around me is getting pregnant!!!! It sucks!!!!! I'm taking Clomid right now and we'll do insemination the day after I get a positive ovulation predictor. It's exciting that I could get pregnant within a week or so, but what if it doesn't work the first time? How many times are we going to do this? Will we do IVF? Adoption?
Tuesday, June 30, 2009
Thank God He's Home!
Holy shit if I had to go one more minute of being a single mom, I think I was going to check into the looney bin. Friday was LOOONNNGGG. All I could think of was "hang on until 3:45pm when we leave for Grace's birthday party at Badger Bouncers." Well while we were running errands Friday morning Paige complained that her eye hurt. I really blew it off, because, well let's face it, I'm a bitch. I stuck her in "quiet time" (read: watch a movie while I get an hour or so to myself) and pretty much ignored her. By around 2pm, her eye was all red and swollen and I thought shit, pinkeye. So I called her doctor who was booked solid the rest of the afternoon, but after hearing Paige's symptoms, squeezed us in. Yep pinkeye. Yep eye drops 4 times a day for 5 days. And yep, no birthday party because she was contagious. OMG, I felt like crying along with her when I broke the bad news to her.
On Friday night I get the bright idea to take her to the Milwaukee Zoo all day Saturday because we couldn't go play with any of her friends and we needed to do SOMETHING. So we packed up and headed to Milwaukee for the day. Driving in Milwaukee by myself with no help to help with directions was slightly nerve wracking, thank God Paige listened to me when I told her to be quiet so I could pay attention.
Grace's parents took pity on us for not being able to make Grace's kid party on Friday so they invited us to her family party on Sunday. That was really nice of them. Mike got to Kristin and Tom's around 3:30pm, so we got there, I dropped Paige off and sped home to have a few minutes to myself.
I'm so glad we went to the zoo on Saturday! Paige had an absolute blast and I pretty much let her do any thing she wanted. We got popcorn, ice cream, rode the train, she rode the carousel, and I think I spent $100 on goat food. She loved seeing all the animals too. The lions were pretty cool because the male lion paced back and forth right by the glass.
Babymaking news: my cyst is gone! YEAH! So I'll start Clomid on my next cycle with insemination the day after a positive ovulation predictor.
OK Mike is unpacking my Jenny Craig food so I better go help him with that.
On Friday night I get the bright idea to take her to the Milwaukee Zoo all day Saturday because we couldn't go play with any of her friends and we needed to do SOMETHING. So we packed up and headed to Milwaukee for the day. Driving in Milwaukee by myself with no help to help with directions was slightly nerve wracking, thank God Paige listened to me when I told her to be quiet so I could pay attention.
Grace's parents took pity on us for not being able to make Grace's kid party on Friday so they invited us to her family party on Sunday. That was really nice of them. Mike got to Kristin and Tom's around 3:30pm, so we got there, I dropped Paige off and sped home to have a few minutes to myself.
I'm so glad we went to the zoo on Saturday! Paige had an absolute blast and I pretty much let her do any thing she wanted. We got popcorn, ice cream, rode the train, she rode the carousel, and I think I spent $100 on goat food. She loved seeing all the animals too. The lions were pretty cool because the male lion paced back and forth right by the glass.
Babymaking news: my cyst is gone! YEAH! So I'll start Clomid on my next cycle with insemination the day after a positive ovulation predictor.
OK Mike is unpacking my Jenny Craig food so I better go help him with that.
Thursday, June 25, 2009
Confessions of a Single Mom
Be prepared to be grossed out. Mike has been gone all week and I am living in filth. Here goes:
Mike loaded and ran the dishwasher on Sunday and I still have not unloaded the clean ones or put dirty ones in there. The dirty dishes have overflowed from my sink and are now taking over my counter. I promise to load and run it at least once before he gets home.
I cannot remember the last time I gave Paige a bath. It's been in the 90's several days this week and I'm justifying her lack of hygiene on the fact that she swam at home and ran through the sprinkler at her sitter's. That counts, right? I am remembering to dress her in clean clothes and underwear so I guess that's something.
Recycling and garbage pick up was yesterday morning and my recycling bins are still sitting outside. Not gross, just lazy.
The cat went outside this morning like he does every morning with the dog and we couldn't find him before we left. On our searching adventure, Paige discovered a dead bird in the front yard that looked pretty fresh. I have a hunch that Max had something to do with it and is off somewhere celebrating with his cat friends. I left a bowl of water outside for him and said screw it, he's staying outside all day. He's probably sitting by the door pathetically meowing and whining. We have shade in the yard and it won't be as hot today so he'll just have to suck it up.
Usually once a day, I use my handheld vacuum to clean up the litter around Max's litter box as he takes great delight in scattering it about. I haven't done that all week and I think the scattered about litter has migrated into the living room.
My floors are disgusting.
I can't wait for Mike to get home, not because I miss him but because I plan to throw the kid at him and run. OK, I miss him a little.
My alarm goes off at 6am, but I ignore it. I awaken to the sound of Paige walking in my room around 6:30 am and saying she's hungry. A few mornings I've told her to wait so I could sleep some more. Yeah that lasted all of 5 minutes.
I know what time it is in the morning based on what TV show is on. 6:30am: WonderPets, 7am: Max and Ruby, 7:30 am: Diego. If I hear Dora come on at 8am I know we're running late.
In my defense, it has been an unusually crazy week. Paige had t-ball pictures on Monday night so we had to get there at 5:15pm. We got home around 4:30pm, wolfed down quick supper then rushed up there. Tuesday night I worked late and didn't get home until around 6:30pm. Last night I didn't get out of Dr. O'Toole's office until 5:20pm so we didn't get home until 6pm.
I'm taking this afternoon off (well if my boss lets me) to go to lunch with a high school friend and then do some shopping. It's my birthday and I'll celebrate however I want!
Mike loaded and ran the dishwasher on Sunday and I still have not unloaded the clean ones or put dirty ones in there. The dirty dishes have overflowed from my sink and are now taking over my counter. I promise to load and run it at least once before he gets home.
I cannot remember the last time I gave Paige a bath. It's been in the 90's several days this week and I'm justifying her lack of hygiene on the fact that she swam at home and ran through the sprinkler at her sitter's. That counts, right? I am remembering to dress her in clean clothes and underwear so I guess that's something.
Recycling and garbage pick up was yesterday morning and my recycling bins are still sitting outside. Not gross, just lazy.
The cat went outside this morning like he does every morning with the dog and we couldn't find him before we left. On our searching adventure, Paige discovered a dead bird in the front yard that looked pretty fresh. I have a hunch that Max had something to do with it and is off somewhere celebrating with his cat friends. I left a bowl of water outside for him and said screw it, he's staying outside all day. He's probably sitting by the door pathetically meowing and whining. We have shade in the yard and it won't be as hot today so he'll just have to suck it up.
Usually once a day, I use my handheld vacuum to clean up the litter around Max's litter box as he takes great delight in scattering it about. I haven't done that all week and I think the scattered about litter has migrated into the living room.
My floors are disgusting.
I can't wait for Mike to get home, not because I miss him but because I plan to throw the kid at him and run. OK, I miss him a little.
My alarm goes off at 6am, but I ignore it. I awaken to the sound of Paige walking in my room around 6:30 am and saying she's hungry. A few mornings I've told her to wait so I could sleep some more. Yeah that lasted all of 5 minutes.
I know what time it is in the morning based on what TV show is on. 6:30am: WonderPets, 7am: Max and Ruby, 7:30 am: Diego. If I hear Dora come on at 8am I know we're running late.
In my defense, it has been an unusually crazy week. Paige had t-ball pictures on Monday night so we had to get there at 5:15pm. We got home around 4:30pm, wolfed down quick supper then rushed up there. Tuesday night I worked late and didn't get home until around 6:30pm. Last night I didn't get out of Dr. O'Toole's office until 5:20pm so we didn't get home until 6pm.
I'm taking this afternoon off (well if my boss lets me) to go to lunch with a high school friend and then do some shopping. It's my birthday and I'll celebrate however I want!
Friday, June 19, 2009
I Married a Good Man
Alternately titled: Another Reason Why I'm Glad I'm Not a Stay at Home Mom. This chick who is in my mom's group drives me insane. She decided to join FB and friend requested me three times before I finally caved on the third request. We'll call her HTH. So HTH posts this little gem as her FB status: "I feel sort of bad though, but not too bad ... hubby is sick now. It sounds like he has what I had over the weekend and earlier this week. The biggest difference though is this ... he gets to lay in bed and sleep while I put the kids to bed. When I was sick, I had asked him to put them to bed without me, and he refused. He gave me some bull about how he has to work, while I can just lay around the house all day, since I'm a SAHM. He's in bed right now." A couple of moms posted how they agreed with this and I'm thinking WTF?!?!?!? To me that just shows a huge lack of respect to the mom. Why would you marry and have children with someone who thinks that little of you? I would honestly kick Mike in the balls if he ever told me to put Paige to bed if I was sick. That man has his flaws, but one of the many good things I can say about him is that he treats me as his equal and if I'm sick, I rest. If he's sick, he rests. That's just how it is. We both created this child, we both contribute to running this household, we both raise this child.
In medical news, I had my annual exam back in February and my Pap came back unsatisfactory for evaluation. This means: "An inadequate specimen does not mean that something is wrong, it just means that the laboratory cannot be certain that there is nothing wrong. Sometimes the Pap smear submitted to the laboratory is inadequate for evaluation, because it contains too few cells for accurate evaluation or the sample was not representative of the area from which most cervical disease occurs or there was excessive blood or inflammation on the slide." OK fine. So I had to come back for a repeat and I did that about a week ago. That one came back unsatisfactory too. ARGH! So I have to go back in a couple of weeks for a colposcopy. Honestly every time I see Dr. Gibson he sees my crotch. I'd like for one time to just go in there and talk to him and not have my feet in the ol' stirrups. At first they wanted to schedule me for next week Wednesday, but I have a follow up pelvic ultrasound with Dr. O'Toole and just though the colposcopy and a pelvic ultrasound might just be a bit much for my va-jay-jay. So next week pelvic ultrasound, week after colposcopy. Jeez, my life is just a frolick in the meadows.
In even more medical news, Paige had a t-ball game a few weeks ago and thank god they had a porta potty there. She peed 5 times in the 45 minutes we were there. It was awful, because she was so traumatized by it. So we left the game early and headed to urgent care. Did I blog about this already? It seems familiar. Her urine sample was normal, but with how often she was going, the urgent care chick gave her an antibiotic. Luckily, it kicked in fast and she was better in a day or two. However, her t-ball game this past week was at the same diamond and she flipped out when we got there. She got all stressed about having to pee a bunch of times so we had to reassure her that she was fine. She did run all weird though like she was worried about peeing her pants.
I read somewhere at work that our health insurance claims are up 31% this year. I like to think that I singlehandedly caused that increase. We went on my insurance in September of last year and since then I've seen 4 different podiatrists, had an ingrown toenail removed, 2 HSG's, 1 pelvic ultrasound, several visits to a reproductive endocrinologist, and bloodwork for both Mike and I up the ying yang.
Mike is leaving on Sunday for the Boundary Waters for a week with my dad, brother in law and a friend of brother in law's. I would absolutely hate it, but he's excited. I'm kind of nervous about being a single mom for a week. Hopefully Paige and I won't end up in the looney bin.
In medical news, I had my annual exam back in February and my Pap came back unsatisfactory for evaluation. This means: "An inadequate specimen does not mean that something is wrong, it just means that the laboratory cannot be certain that there is nothing wrong. Sometimes the Pap smear submitted to the laboratory is inadequate for evaluation, because it contains too few cells for accurate evaluation or the sample was not representative of the area from which most cervical disease occurs or there was excessive blood or inflammation on the slide." OK fine. So I had to come back for a repeat and I did that about a week ago. That one came back unsatisfactory too. ARGH! So I have to go back in a couple of weeks for a colposcopy. Honestly every time I see Dr. Gibson he sees my crotch. I'd like for one time to just go in there and talk to him and not have my feet in the ol' stirrups. At first they wanted to schedule me for next week Wednesday, but I have a follow up pelvic ultrasound with Dr. O'Toole and just though the colposcopy and a pelvic ultrasound might just be a bit much for my va-jay-jay. So next week pelvic ultrasound, week after colposcopy. Jeez, my life is just a frolick in the meadows.
In even more medical news, Paige had a t-ball game a few weeks ago and thank god they had a porta potty there. She peed 5 times in the 45 minutes we were there. It was awful, because she was so traumatized by it. So we left the game early and headed to urgent care. Did I blog about this already? It seems familiar. Her urine sample was normal, but with how often she was going, the urgent care chick gave her an antibiotic. Luckily, it kicked in fast and she was better in a day or two. However, her t-ball game this past week was at the same diamond and she flipped out when we got there. She got all stressed about having to pee a bunch of times so we had to reassure her that she was fine. She did run all weird though like she was worried about peeing her pants.
I read somewhere at work that our health insurance claims are up 31% this year. I like to think that I singlehandedly caused that increase. We went on my insurance in September of last year and since then I've seen 4 different podiatrists, had an ingrown toenail removed, 2 HSG's, 1 pelvic ultrasound, several visits to a reproductive endocrinologist, and bloodwork for both Mike and I up the ying yang.
Mike is leaving on Sunday for the Boundary Waters for a week with my dad, brother in law and a friend of brother in law's. I would absolutely hate it, but he's excited. I'm kind of nervous about being a single mom for a week. Hopefully Paige and I won't end up in the looney bin.
Wednesday, June 03, 2009
7 Pounds GONE In 2 Weeks!!!
I'm 7 pounds lighter than when I began Jenny Craig on May 20th! I'm so excited! I lost 2.8 pounds this week and almost dropped over when I saw the number on my scale. I really didn't stick to the menu very well this past week and "cheated" quite a bit, also didn't exercise as much either. But I must be doing something right. If I had a snack that wasn't on the menu, then I wouldn't have my JC snack. And I cheated mostly with reduced fat wheat thins, not sweets. I have been craving crackers SO BAD and couldn't resist them at Target. The food is expensive ($245 every 2 weeks), and I still have to buy my own dairy and produce, but IT'S WORKING! That's the most important thing. I got a new shipment of food yesterday and they sent a few meals that I know I won't like (meatloaf with BBQ sauce-YUCK), so I'll have to substitute a Lean Cuisine or some other meal like that. The first month of food was pre planned for me, so after this is gone, I get to pick my own food. Most of the food is pretty good. I have to start thinking of some things to reward myself for every 10 pounds I lose. Here's what I have so far:
10 pounds: New Kenny Chesney Greatest Hits CD
20 pounds: new pair of workout shoes
30 pounds:
40 pounds: family picture (I've been avoiding getting my picture taken)
50 pounds: shopping spree for new clothes!!!
60 pounds:
70 pounds:
80 pounds:
90 pounds:
Any ideas?
Our Memorial Day weekend in Eagle River was really nice. Mike took Paige fishing a lot, so I had lots of time to hang out with Dylan, read and relax. The weather was perfect so we really lucked out. We took Paige mini golfing and go-karting which she loved.
It's been a long few days. Paige's 5th birthday party was on Saturday. I hate getting ready for parties and this year was no exception. I was Queen Bitch working my ass off to get the house clean and ready and just about bit Mike's and Paige's head off a few times. Why do I do this every year? But everyone had a blast so that's what matters. I'm so annoyed with how rude people are. I invited around 30 people, put regrets only on the invite, got no phone calls from anyone saying they couldn't come, and only around 15 showed. Basically, family and some close friends from GB with a daughter a month younger than Paige. So we had an insane amount of food leftover and sent some home with people. My father in law and step mother in law (M & B, you'll remember them from my post about my in laws being pigs), decided to stay until Paige's t-ball game on Monday night. UGH. All I wanted on Saturday night and Sunday was my quiet house back and time to relax and do laundry. But noooooo, M and B decide to make themselves at home for the next 2 days. Even better, B's daughter and her boyfriend came up on Sunday so we had to get lunch ready for them. They redeemed themselves only by keeping Paige occupied and Mike keeping his dad busy in the garage. But the last thing I wanted was to entertain so I kept to myself. I really don't care if they thought I was rude.
I seriously cannot stand my FIL. When I was taking pictures of Paige by her birthday cake we were saying "say frosting!" or some gay thing to get her to smile for the camera and his dad yells out "say cowshit." I said we don't say that and he goes "well our kids' photographers said that." I don't give a rats ass what they said, don't say cowshit around my 5 year old who goes to a Catholic school, my mom Sister Mary Monica and my 82 year old grandma, thanks. He threw away his chew can in my bathroom trash can, hogged my chair all weekend, and when he wasn't in my chair he was stinking up my one and only bathroom. My poor toilet. On Sunday night he turned on some show where they were bleeping out every other word, and Paige asked him nicely to watch a different show. He totally ignored her. I was livid. And Mike (bless his heart, I love that man, I really do) has no balls around his family. He didn't say a word to his dad about that. He always says "oh grandpa's girl" but has yet to push her on the swings, play a game with her, draw, play play doh, etc. All he expects her to do is sit on his lap.
So on Monday, they were in my house all alone while Mike and I were at work and Paige at school and the sitter's. Not weird at all. They ended up going to GB, and were at least 20 minutes late to Paige's t-ball game...the one thing they stayed for. And Paige had a rough night. She went to the bathroom at least 4 times in the 45 minutes we were there and was so traumatized by it. We left the game early and took her right to Urgent Care figuring she had a bladder infection. Her urine sample was negative, but with her constant peeing, the NP gave her an antibiotic anyway. She's better already. But Monday night was rough because we were at Urgent Care for over an hour, didn't get home until after 8:30pm and Paige would not settle down and sleep because she kept having to pee and then was getting all upset about having to pee. She slept late yesterday morning, and wanted me to stay home with her. Major mom guilt. I had to go in to work because we had car seat appointments. It just killed me that I couldn't stay home with my kid because I had to go take care of irresponsible parents who basically do whatever they want. As I'm putting Paige in her car seat to leave, my cell phone rings and it's work. I ignore it. Work called again and I ignored that one. It was one of our secretaries and she didn't leave a message. I get in and realize some chick meeting with a CPS worker wants to come in that day for a car seat appointment...that's why I was getting called. Seriously, not an emergency. We were booked up yesterday, but I scheduled her for a couple of weeks. If she remembers, I'll be shocked. So car seat appointments all morning, a meeting at the hospital in the afternoon, and then back to work until 7pm last night. Back at it today at 7:30am. And it was just a long day...one of my coworkers is absolutely useless and lazy and my boss coddles her. Drives me up a wall.
Back to work.
10 pounds: New Kenny Chesney Greatest Hits CD
20 pounds: new pair of workout shoes
30 pounds:
40 pounds: family picture (I've been avoiding getting my picture taken)
50 pounds: shopping spree for new clothes!!!
60 pounds:
70 pounds:
80 pounds:
90 pounds:
Any ideas?
Our Memorial Day weekend in Eagle River was really nice. Mike took Paige fishing a lot, so I had lots of time to hang out with Dylan, read and relax. The weather was perfect so we really lucked out. We took Paige mini golfing and go-karting which she loved.
It's been a long few days. Paige's 5th birthday party was on Saturday. I hate getting ready for parties and this year was no exception. I was Queen Bitch working my ass off to get the house clean and ready and just about bit Mike's and Paige's head off a few times. Why do I do this every year? But everyone had a blast so that's what matters. I'm so annoyed with how rude people are. I invited around 30 people, put regrets only on the invite, got no phone calls from anyone saying they couldn't come, and only around 15 showed. Basically, family and some close friends from GB with a daughter a month younger than Paige. So we had an insane amount of food leftover and sent some home with people. My father in law and step mother in law (M & B, you'll remember them from my post about my in laws being pigs), decided to stay until Paige's t-ball game on Monday night. UGH. All I wanted on Saturday night and Sunday was my quiet house back and time to relax and do laundry. But noooooo, M and B decide to make themselves at home for the next 2 days. Even better, B's daughter and her boyfriend came up on Sunday so we had to get lunch ready for them. They redeemed themselves only by keeping Paige occupied and Mike keeping his dad busy in the garage. But the last thing I wanted was to entertain so I kept to myself. I really don't care if they thought I was rude.
I seriously cannot stand my FIL. When I was taking pictures of Paige by her birthday cake we were saying "say frosting!" or some gay thing to get her to smile for the camera and his dad yells out "say cowshit." I said we don't say that and he goes "well our kids' photographers said that." I don't give a rats ass what they said, don't say cowshit around my 5 year old who goes to a Catholic school, my mom Sister Mary Monica and my 82 year old grandma, thanks. He threw away his chew can in my bathroom trash can, hogged my chair all weekend, and when he wasn't in my chair he was stinking up my one and only bathroom. My poor toilet. On Sunday night he turned on some show where they were bleeping out every other word, and Paige asked him nicely to watch a different show. He totally ignored her. I was livid. And Mike (bless his heart, I love that man, I really do) has no balls around his family. He didn't say a word to his dad about that. He always says "oh grandpa's girl" but has yet to push her on the swings, play a game with her, draw, play play doh, etc. All he expects her to do is sit on his lap.
So on Monday, they were in my house all alone while Mike and I were at work and Paige at school and the sitter's. Not weird at all. They ended up going to GB, and were at least 20 minutes late to Paige's t-ball game...the one thing they stayed for. And Paige had a rough night. She went to the bathroom at least 4 times in the 45 minutes we were there and was so traumatized by it. We left the game early and took her right to Urgent Care figuring she had a bladder infection. Her urine sample was negative, but with her constant peeing, the NP gave her an antibiotic anyway. She's better already. But Monday night was rough because we were at Urgent Care for over an hour, didn't get home until after 8:30pm and Paige would not settle down and sleep because she kept having to pee and then was getting all upset about having to pee. She slept late yesterday morning, and wanted me to stay home with her. Major mom guilt. I had to go in to work because we had car seat appointments. It just killed me that I couldn't stay home with my kid because I had to go take care of irresponsible parents who basically do whatever they want. As I'm putting Paige in her car seat to leave, my cell phone rings and it's work. I ignore it. Work called again and I ignored that one. It was one of our secretaries and she didn't leave a message. I get in and realize some chick meeting with a CPS worker wants to come in that day for a car seat appointment...that's why I was getting called. Seriously, not an emergency. We were booked up yesterday, but I scheduled her for a couple of weeks. If she remembers, I'll be shocked. So car seat appointments all morning, a meeting at the hospital in the afternoon, and then back to work until 7pm last night. Back at it today at 7:30am. And it was just a long day...one of my coworkers is absolutely useless and lazy and my boss coddles her. Drives me up a wall.
Back to work.
Friday, May 22, 2009
Crabby
I'm ornary today. I know it's because I'm tired, got to bed too late last night and the kid woke me up too early today.
I really want to go to a concert coming up, but can't find anyone to come with me.
I'm feeling like a loser with no friends.
Just checked my work email and my boss won't let me go to a 3 day conference coming up in September because she can't afford to have me out of the office for 3 days. Whatever. All my expenses would be paid for. Maybe I can convince her if I work the next 3 Fridays.
I'm hungry and already sick of fruits and salads. I don't like the food I have to eat today for lunch and supper.
We're going to Eagle River this weekend. It sounds crazy but I've spent almost every night this week getting organized and packing for it. I'm trying to pack light, but we're basically camping in Kristin and Tom's cabin, so we have to bring our own sheets, pillows, towels, eating utensils, food, etc. Plus I had to sit down and look at my Jenny Craig meal plan and list out the foods I have to bring along with my yogurt, fruits, veggies, salad, milk, cottage cheese, etc. There is no way all of our stuff is going to fit in one cooler. I've been wondering why are we going to all of this trouble for one weekend, but it's better than sitting around here driving each other crazy. Plus I've been trying to do laundry all week so we don't have a huge shitpile waiting when we get home, plus keep the house semi clean. ARGH!
ETA: More reasons I'm crabby. Paige's bus was 5 minutes early, so we missed it. I feel like we will always have medical bills. I'm close to paying off my HSG and other crap I had done at Aurora last year, and we have about $150 left on Mike's chiropractor bill from last summer (about $500 total). Well we found out Mike's ER visit from last November goes towards his deductible so that's another $535. His entire ER visit for 3 stitches in one finger, and 5 in the other cost around $700. $200 for the "facility" charge, the hospital and supplies, and $500 for the physician's assistant to put in 8 stitches. His infertility workup at Aurora is another $450 and we're responsible for that too since it was this year and goes towards our deductible. UGH. Everytime I think we're getting ahead....WHAM something else happens. I still can't believe we have to cough up $700 for an ER visit because Mike was cutting deer with some machete weilding Rambo-wannabe who had no idea what he was doing.
I can't believe how much I have to do this afternoon: vacuum, finish packing, make a casserole, clean out the litter box, water all my shrubs and flowers, shower (well wash my hair, then take a bath), shave my legs, pack the cooler, pack a supper for Paige, etc. All I want to do is take a nap.
I really want to go to a concert coming up, but can't find anyone to come with me.
I'm feeling like a loser with no friends.
Just checked my work email and my boss won't let me go to a 3 day conference coming up in September because she can't afford to have me out of the office for 3 days. Whatever. All my expenses would be paid for. Maybe I can convince her if I work the next 3 Fridays.
I'm hungry and already sick of fruits and salads. I don't like the food I have to eat today for lunch and supper.
We're going to Eagle River this weekend. It sounds crazy but I've spent almost every night this week getting organized and packing for it. I'm trying to pack light, but we're basically camping in Kristin and Tom's cabin, so we have to bring our own sheets, pillows, towels, eating utensils, food, etc. Plus I had to sit down and look at my Jenny Craig meal plan and list out the foods I have to bring along with my yogurt, fruits, veggies, salad, milk, cottage cheese, etc. There is no way all of our stuff is going to fit in one cooler. I've been wondering why are we going to all of this trouble for one weekend, but it's better than sitting around here driving each other crazy. Plus I've been trying to do laundry all week so we don't have a huge shitpile waiting when we get home, plus keep the house semi clean. ARGH!
ETA: More reasons I'm crabby. Paige's bus was 5 minutes early, so we missed it. I feel like we will always have medical bills. I'm close to paying off my HSG and other crap I had done at Aurora last year, and we have about $150 left on Mike's chiropractor bill from last summer (about $500 total). Well we found out Mike's ER visit from last November goes towards his deductible so that's another $535. His entire ER visit for 3 stitches in one finger, and 5 in the other cost around $700. $200 for the "facility" charge, the hospital and supplies, and $500 for the physician's assistant to put in 8 stitches. His infertility workup at Aurora is another $450 and we're responsible for that too since it was this year and goes towards our deductible. UGH. Everytime I think we're getting ahead....WHAM something else happens. I still can't believe we have to cough up $700 for an ER visit because Mike was cutting deer with some machete weilding Rambo-wannabe who had no idea what he was doing.
I can't believe how much I have to do this afternoon: vacuum, finish packing, make a casserole, clean out the litter box, water all my shrubs and flowers, shower (well wash my hair, then take a bath), shave my legs, pack the cooler, pack a supper for Paige, etc. All I want to do is take a nap.
Wednesday, May 20, 2009
Day 1
So my Jenny Craig food was waiting for me when I got home. Luckily the neighbor girl was home and free to play so I shipped the kid there so I could unpack everything. Holy crap those meals are small. It took me a while to make room in my freezer and pantry, but I was able to fit it all in there. I ended up having to go to the Pig (Piggly Wiggly) to stock up on fruits, veggies and assorted other healthy items. Healthy food is EXPENSIVE and hard to find at a small town grocery store. I can't believe how many fruits and veggies I eat, I will probably turn into a strawberry at some point. Everything is all laid out for me and I follow a meal plan. Today for example, at breakfast I had a "bowl" of their cereal, Cranberry Almond Crunch and it was delish. I told Mike it was good, but I wasn't going to share a bite since there was only like 5 in there. Then I had a 1/2 cup of cottage cheese (half and half of low fat and regular, I can't make the switch to low fat cottage cheese just yet) and a 1/2 cup of mandarin oranges. My morning snack is a cup of fruit and one of their bars, but I didn't see this particular bar in my shipment of food, so I bought some Kashi bars last night. Lunch is their Turkey Burger, with a salad I provide, their dressing, and one piece of string cheese. My afternoon snack is 2 cups of fruit, then supper is their spaghetti and meatballs, soup, and my veggies (2 CUPS!!!!!) and my evening snack is a cookie and 1 cup of milk. Pretty much all veggies are "free foods" so I can eat them in addition to all of this stuff.
Last night I spent a lot of time cutting up fruit, measuring out my portions for breakfast and lunch today and reading over some of the materials they gave me. This is definitely going to take some time to adjust, but I'm sure I will get comfortable with this in a week or two.
I am going to stick with walking and strength training for exercise right now. I definitely want to get at least one 15 minute walk in at work every day and I really should walk the dog more often too. My main focus in these first two weeks is the food.
I have a phone consultation with one of their people tonight, and that will be once a week.
I want to lose 90 pounds and that will get me to a weight I was at 10 years ago in the summer. I was interning at SC Johnson, working out a lot and I have to admit, I looked pretty good.
I WILL DO IT!!!!
Last night I spent a lot of time cutting up fruit, measuring out my portions for breakfast and lunch today and reading over some of the materials they gave me. This is definitely going to take some time to adjust, but I'm sure I will get comfortable with this in a week or two.
I am going to stick with walking and strength training for exercise right now. I definitely want to get at least one 15 minute walk in at work every day and I really should walk the dog more often too. My main focus in these first two weeks is the food.
I have a phone consultation with one of their people tonight, and that will be once a week.
I want to lose 90 pounds and that will get me to a weight I was at 10 years ago in the summer. I was interning at SC Johnson, working out a lot and I have to admit, I looked pretty good.
I WILL DO IT!!!!
Thursday, May 14, 2009
Houston We Have a Problem
My mission if I choose to accept it (which I kind of have to) is to turn this into a comfortable sleeping space for MIL and step FIL who are coming over in 2 weekends and spending the night:
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This would be our infamous "back bedroom" aka "How to Control Clutter in a Small House." If you are looking for something and can't find it, it's usually in the "back bedroom." It's our catch all room for after we go shopping, as illistrated in the above picture, and we don't feel like putting the crap away. I have to admit I've never let the room get quite this bad. The big blue and brown blob in the middle of the room is the new comforter I bought months ago and we just haven't bought paint yet for the bedroom. In the picture directly above, you will also notice a big bowl with epsom salts that I used to soak my toe, Paige's Easter basket, Paige's outgrown fall and winter clothes, and a bin filled with household stuff I got at Target this week.
The middle picture contains clothes I'm selling on ebay, and a couple of baskets of random crap that I have to go through to donate to Paige's school rummage sale. Yes that's a measuring tape, someone wanted the measurements of the clothes I'm selling. I'm selling that ride on toy of Paige's if anyone is interested. $25. I'm slowly starting to put her outgrown toys in there too in hopes that she doesn't notice they are gone and then I can sell them. I've already hid that toy and the Leap Frog alphabet thing from the fridge and she hasn't noticed. I'm quite surprised as she usually doesn't miss a thing.
There are actually 2 twin beds in that room that each have clean sheets that just haven't yet been put back on. The closet in that room is pretty well full too, but somewhat organized. If we do have another kid, we are so screwed.
Oh yeah, that top picture has my wedding flowers. Aren't they pretty? So rather than actually going to clean it out while Paige is at the neighbor kid's, I'm just sitting here blogging about it. I'm being somewhat productive though, I have a load of wash in right now and am going to hang it up when it's done. '
I think I have to put out tonight. I knocked my rearview mirror off my car and scraped the side of it pretty bad when backing out of the garage this morning. I left Mike a very apologetic phone message and he never called back today. When he didn't call back I knew he was pissed. He usually calls every day just to chat for a few minutes. So I offered to put out tonight as soon as he walked in, but he didn't seem to enthused. I bet I can change his mind.
Wednesday, May 13, 2009
A New Start
I'm done being this heavy. I've finally reached the point where I'm ready to do something. I've tried Weight Watchers, but I don't have enough willpower to stick with something so flexible. I've gained even more weight in the past month or so, and have gone up a size. Nothing in my closet fits. I have a double chin and don't want to be in any pictures. I'm done.
I've decided to do Jenny Craig. I need something extremely structured and laid out. I've ordered 4 weeks of food and I get a daily breakfast, lunch, dinner, 1 dessert and 1 snack. I can supplement the food with my own fruits and vegetables, but the food will come with a detailed menu plan so I'll know exactly how much I can eat. I want to lose 90 pounds. Once I lose 45 pounds, I'll get $50 off my next food order, and once I reach my goal weight and keep it off for a year, I get half of my membership fee back. I have a once a week phone consultation with a Jenny Craig person.
Mike is 100% supportive. He knows I'll be a huge crabby bitch at first and that him and Paige are pretty much on their own for supper. We might cook a few things on the weekend, freeze them and he can heat up during the week.
My goal is to lose 15 pounds before my high school reunion in 2 months. Wish me luck, I'm going to need it!
I've decided to do Jenny Craig. I need something extremely structured and laid out. I've ordered 4 weeks of food and I get a daily breakfast, lunch, dinner, 1 dessert and 1 snack. I can supplement the food with my own fruits and vegetables, but the food will come with a detailed menu plan so I'll know exactly how much I can eat. I want to lose 90 pounds. Once I lose 45 pounds, I'll get $50 off my next food order, and once I reach my goal weight and keep it off for a year, I get half of my membership fee back. I have a once a week phone consultation with a Jenny Craig person.
Mike is 100% supportive. He knows I'll be a huge crabby bitch at first and that him and Paige are pretty much on their own for supper. We might cook a few things on the weekend, freeze them and he can heat up during the week.
My goal is to lose 15 pounds before my high school reunion in 2 months. Wish me luck, I'm going to need it!
Tuesday, May 12, 2009
Do I Really Have a Five Year Old?
How has it been 5 years since my life changed on May 12, 2004? Seriously, how did this kid go from this: 
to this:
It's just not possible. To quote my friend Melissa, I g
uess I blinked and she turned into this:
uess I blinked and she turned into this: I then I must have daydreamed for a little bit because all of a sudden she was potty trained and sitting on Santa's lap:
And then I guess I blinked again because she was 4 and having a Princess Birthday Party:
Then like a day after her party, she started school!
And now I have a 5 year old who is old enough to feed her cousin:
My sweet Paige, I love you so much. I don't think you'll know how much I love you until you have a child of your own. Thanks for making me your mama.
Monday, May 11, 2009
Doctor's Appointments
This morning was my repeat HSG. First I had to go to Women's Speciality Care to pee in a cup and have them confirm that I really am not pregnant. The worst part of that was when the receptionist goes "oh this is exciting!" when I told her i was there for a pregnancy test. Ouch. Stick the knife right in my heart. Then over to Bellin for the HSG. I had moment of panic when they told me that a different doctor who've I heard is not very nice at WSC signed the order for my HSG so they weren't sure of that not nice doctor was coming or Dr. O'toole. THANK GOD Dr. O'Toole walked in. I was expecting the worst part to be showing my crotch to yet another man I barely know, but YOWCHA. This one for whatever reason was way more painful than the first one. I was doing Lamaze breathing. The AWESOME news is that IVF is not our only option. YEAH! The dye spilled through both my tubes, but for whatever reason one of my tubes is really, really big. It's not blocked, but it's big, meaning that the little hairs that are inside your tubes (I didn't know they existed) aren't reaching the egg to sweep it down. So after my repeat ultrasound in about a month, I'm going to start Clomid with IUI. My insurance pays for that!!!! YAHOO!!!! Please pray for us that this works. I still can't believe how much that HSG hurt, I'm still feeling crampy.
Bellin has valet parking, which I've never done before. It was pretty cool. Then I had about 3 hours to kill before my appointment with Dr. Van Beek, the best podiatrist ever. So I spent over an hour and $200 @ Target, then hit the mall to make a few returns. Dr. Van Beek cleaned out the dried blood, put a ton of antibacterial stuff on, then re-bandaged it, the toe only. No more surgical shoe, YEHAW!! Still can't get it wet though.
Then home to dig up my dead shrubs, off to pick up the kid, then True Value to return my dead shrubs that didn't come back this year, home for a quick supper and then to Paige's first t-ball practice. She was so cute! She was one of very few girls, I think there's only 3 girls total on her team and I think there were 12 boys. I was so proud of her, she hit the ball better and ran the bases better than a few of the boys! She really seemed to have fun which was the most important thing and so fun to watch. Her first game is next week and she has games every Monday until about the middle of July.
It's about 10pm right now. 5 years ago today at this time, I was asking for the anesthesiologist and in the throes of intense labor. I'd already thrown up and wondering how long this hell would last. I went from 4cm to delivered in 4 hours, but it was a very intense 4 hours. I can't say this enough, I still can't believe my baby is 5! More to come on that tomorrow on her actual 5th birthday. I love you Paige!
Bellin has valet parking, which I've never done before. It was pretty cool. Then I had about 3 hours to kill before my appointment with Dr. Van Beek, the best podiatrist ever. So I spent over an hour and $200 @ Target, then hit the mall to make a few returns. Dr. Van Beek cleaned out the dried blood, put a ton of antibacterial stuff on, then re-bandaged it, the toe only. No more surgical shoe, YEHAW!! Still can't get it wet though.
Then home to dig up my dead shrubs, off to pick up the kid, then True Value to return my dead shrubs that didn't come back this year, home for a quick supper and then to Paige's first t-ball practice. She was so cute! She was one of very few girls, I think there's only 3 girls total on her team and I think there were 12 boys. I was so proud of her, she hit the ball better and ran the bases better than a few of the boys! She really seemed to have fun which was the most important thing and so fun to watch. Her first game is next week and she has games every Monday until about the middle of July.
It's about 10pm right now. 5 years ago today at this time, I was asking for the anesthesiologist and in the throes of intense labor. I'd already thrown up and wondering how long this hell would last. I went from 4cm to delivered in 4 hours, but it was a very intense 4 hours. I can't say this enough, I still can't believe my baby is 5! More to come on that tomorrow on her actual 5th birthday. I love you Paige!
Sunday, May 10, 2009
Dear People In the Pew In Front of Us at Church,
Church is not a party, it's a mass. It's sacred. We receive a sacrament, Jesus's body and blood. Therefore, after Communion, please refrain from speaking so loudly that I can't hear the singing, take the disgusted looks off your face when the 1st Communion kids did the May Crowning after Communion, and also refrain from impatiently gathering your things and being shift and ancey during the last song. I realize you must have had brunch reservations to get to and those were obviously your priority and the May Crowning added an extra 5 minutes to church, but seriously, some of us go to church and pray, so chill out. I'm sure Mass is long forgotten in your minds while you are stuffing your faces at an overpriced brunch. I've never seen you at Mass and I'm sure I never will again.
On that note, has Mother's Day turned into a Christmas/Easter holiday where it's one of only few times that people go to church? Church was PACKED. I realize that some people were visitors, but they had to put out extra chairs, I can't imagine we had that many visitors to our little town. If you don't go to church every week, don't go on Mother's Day.
I know I sound really judgemental, but I feel very strongly about this.
Paige experienced getting hurt by friends for the first time yesterday. She was playing with her friend Jen, across the street who is 10. There's a couple of other girls who play together with Paige and Jen and I think they are around 8 years old. You may think it's weird that we let Paige play with a 10 year old, but Jen has been at Sandi's since Paige first started and has always been like a big sister to Paige. She's a very nice girl and her parents have said several times that Paige is welcome there anytime. Paige played there almost every night last week and even ate supper there a couple of nights. Yesterday she was there for most of the morning and afternoon. Around 3pm she came back home all upset. Apparently Jen told Paige it was time to go home and then asked another girl if she could sleep over. I really can't blame Jen for not wanting to play with a 5 year old anymore, but it broke my heart to see my baby heartbroken. Paige is so sensitive like me and I have a feeling she will get her feelings hurt many, many times. Do you know how hard it was for me to keep it together and not break down crying too? I will need strength to get through the many years of school, that is for sure!
Mike is attempting to keep Paige out of my hair today as my Mother's Day present but it has not been successful. She is extra annoying and pesty right now and will not get out of my ass. I think she can tell that Mike is trying to keep her out of my hair and she's doing everything in her power to stay in my hair. My Mother's Day present to myself is lots of coffee, donut holes and the Sunday paper. Aaahh....
On that note, has Mother's Day turned into a Christmas/Easter holiday where it's one of only few times that people go to church? Church was PACKED. I realize that some people were visitors, but they had to put out extra chairs, I can't imagine we had that many visitors to our little town. If you don't go to church every week, don't go on Mother's Day.
I know I sound really judgemental, but I feel very strongly about this.
Paige experienced getting hurt by friends for the first time yesterday. She was playing with her friend Jen, across the street who is 10. There's a couple of other girls who play together with Paige and Jen and I think they are around 8 years old. You may think it's weird that we let Paige play with a 10 year old, but Jen has been at Sandi's since Paige first started and has always been like a big sister to Paige. She's a very nice girl and her parents have said several times that Paige is welcome there anytime. Paige played there almost every night last week and even ate supper there a couple of nights. Yesterday she was there for most of the morning and afternoon. Around 3pm she came back home all upset. Apparently Jen told Paige it was time to go home and then asked another girl if she could sleep over. I really can't blame Jen for not wanting to play with a 5 year old anymore, but it broke my heart to see my baby heartbroken. Paige is so sensitive like me and I have a feeling she will get her feelings hurt many, many times. Do you know how hard it was for me to keep it together and not break down crying too? I will need strength to get through the many years of school, that is for sure!
Mike is attempting to keep Paige out of my hair today as my Mother's Day present but it has not been successful. She is extra annoying and pesty right now and will not get out of my ass. I think she can tell that Mike is trying to keep her out of my hair and she's doing everything in her power to stay in my hair. My Mother's Day present to myself is lots of coffee, donut holes and the Sunday paper. Aaahh....
Wednesday, May 06, 2009
Drained
OK so I'm really not drained right now, but had I written this Friday night I really was drained. Last week was, shall we say, oh a nightmare at work. Maybe nightmare is a little strong but it was absolutely insane. All I did was swine flu. I put in an extra 10 hours. Not fun. And I was pretty much working in hyper overdrive mode all week.
Paige's daycare situation did not help matters. Copied and pasted from an email because I'm time efficient so here goes: A couple of weeks ago, the new county certification lady visited Sandi and told her that she had too many kids and had until April 30th to correct the situation (i.e. get rid of some kids). So Sandi decided to get state licensed so she can have 8 kids under the age of 7. Well that takes a while. She applied right away and got her paperwork turned in ASAP, she’s just waiting for a state person to do a home visit. So she asked those who can to have family, friends, etc. watch the kids until she gets state licensed. Well, we obviously have no one close by. So after thinking about it, we decided to send her to Building Blocks (BB, the only daycare center in town) for at least until the time Sandi got state licensed. Then as we looked at our schedules more, it made sense to just keep Paige at BB. Well finally on Friday I had to tell Sandi and I had a knot in my stomach all day. So when I told Sandi Friday, she started crying, which got me going. As I was watching Paige play with the other girls, (after Sandi and I got it together) I just knew in my heart of hearts, it wasn’t the right decision to pull her from Sandi’s. It’s so hard to explain but I think other moms will get it. Sandi’s is her 2nd home. And she knew that Paige was one of the kids that didn’t have family in the area to watch her while she waited for her state license, so she expected to have Paige there. Then on the way home Paige tells me that Makayla, a 4k kid in her class who also goes to BB, told Paige and everyone else that Paige was going to BB. That’s how she found out. Paige started bawling on the way home and said she didn’t want to go to BB, she wanted to stay at Sandi’s. So Paige and I both walk into the house crying, Mike was like WTF?!?!?! So after Paige went to bed, Mike and I talked and figured we could live with her schedule because it’s worth it to us to have Paige stay at Sandi’s. I know other people may not think it’s the right decision, but it works for us. Like I said, Sandi’s is truly Paige’s 2nd home and she is so comfortable there and I know Sandi truly loves her. So Mike went over to Sandi's on Friday night and told her we're keeping her there and they talked for a while about her schedule. She said as long as I call ahead if I'm going to be late and just let her know when Mike needs to pick up because of my car seat appointments, conferences, etc. she's totally fine. Before Mike left, Sandi goes "THANK YOU Mike" with so much happiness in her voice. It works for us and that's all that matters.
I really have not seen much of Paige lately. As soon as she gets home from school, she quick changes and then runs across the street to play with the neighbor kids. I try to keep her here to talk and hang out, but it's not worth it, she really doesn't want anything to do with me. She's been there since we got home a little after 4pm today.
I had my ingrown toenail removed on Monday. THAT was fun. They gave me some pills to "take the edge off". Well it made me "sleep all day." The two things that really suck is this ugly uncomfortable surgical shoe and not letting the bandage get wet. I attempted to shower yesterday with a plastic bag tied around my foot and that didn't work. Today I washed my hair under the running faucet in the tub, and then bathed with my right foot propped up, more info than you wanted to know I'm sure. So then I swing my right foot out of the tub, start to roll out and grab the towel bar to lift me up. Well the towel bar doesn't hold me up. So that option is out. Before you laugh, try giving yourself a bath with your right foot propped up and then getting out with just one foot down and your arms. I'm going to have to have Mike lift me out like a fat cripple.
In even more medical news, I had an ultrasound yesterday to check for endometriosis. Dr. O'Toole saw "something" on my left ovary and wants me to come back in 4-6 weeks for a repeat u/s. Next week Monday I'm having a repeat HSG and I honestly don't have high hopes for it. I really think I have blocked tubes and that is the cause of my infertility, not the endo. But I found out Women's Speciality Care is one of the sites that I can have the monitoring done with that one program that covers 6 IVF cycles. Carmen said they deal with a lot of IVF clients who are in that program and have the egg retrieval and transfer done in IL or MN. so I'll probably go there for the monitoring (blood work and ultrasounds).
OK my kid and hubby are back so off to enjoy some family time before the kid goes to bed.
Paige's daycare situation did not help matters. Copied and pasted from an email because I'm time efficient so here goes: A couple of weeks ago, the new county certification lady visited Sandi and told her that she had too many kids and had until April 30th to correct the situation (i.e. get rid of some kids). So Sandi decided to get state licensed so she can have 8 kids under the age of 7. Well that takes a while. She applied right away and got her paperwork turned in ASAP, she’s just waiting for a state person to do a home visit. So she asked those who can to have family, friends, etc. watch the kids until she gets state licensed. Well, we obviously have no one close by. So after thinking about it, we decided to send her to Building Blocks (BB, the only daycare center in town) for at least until the time Sandi got state licensed. Then as we looked at our schedules more, it made sense to just keep Paige at BB. Well finally on Friday I had to tell Sandi and I had a knot in my stomach all day. So when I told Sandi Friday, she started crying, which got me going. As I was watching Paige play with the other girls, (after Sandi and I got it together) I just knew in my heart of hearts, it wasn’t the right decision to pull her from Sandi’s. It’s so hard to explain but I think other moms will get it. Sandi’s is her 2nd home. And she knew that Paige was one of the kids that didn’t have family in the area to watch her while she waited for her state license, so she expected to have Paige there. Then on the way home Paige tells me that Makayla, a 4k kid in her class who also goes to BB, told Paige and everyone else that Paige was going to BB. That’s how she found out. Paige started bawling on the way home and said she didn’t want to go to BB, she wanted to stay at Sandi’s. So Paige and I both walk into the house crying, Mike was like WTF?!?!?! So after Paige went to bed, Mike and I talked and figured we could live with her schedule because it’s worth it to us to have Paige stay at Sandi’s. I know other people may not think it’s the right decision, but it works for us. Like I said, Sandi’s is truly Paige’s 2nd home and she is so comfortable there and I know Sandi truly loves her. So Mike went over to Sandi's on Friday night and told her we're keeping her there and they talked for a while about her schedule. She said as long as I call ahead if I'm going to be late and just let her know when Mike needs to pick up because of my car seat appointments, conferences, etc. she's totally fine. Before Mike left, Sandi goes "THANK YOU Mike" with so much happiness in her voice. It works for us and that's all that matters.
I really have not seen much of Paige lately. As soon as she gets home from school, she quick changes and then runs across the street to play with the neighbor kids. I try to keep her here to talk and hang out, but it's not worth it, she really doesn't want anything to do with me. She's been there since we got home a little after 4pm today.
I had my ingrown toenail removed on Monday. THAT was fun. They gave me some pills to "take the edge off". Well it made me "sleep all day." The two things that really suck is this ugly uncomfortable surgical shoe and not letting the bandage get wet. I attempted to shower yesterday with a plastic bag tied around my foot and that didn't work. Today I washed my hair under the running faucet in the tub, and then bathed with my right foot propped up, more info than you wanted to know I'm sure. So then I swing my right foot out of the tub, start to roll out and grab the towel bar to lift me up. Well the towel bar doesn't hold me up. So that option is out. Before you laugh, try giving yourself a bath with your right foot propped up and then getting out with just one foot down and your arms. I'm going to have to have Mike lift me out like a fat cripple.
In even more medical news, I had an ultrasound yesterday to check for endometriosis. Dr. O'Toole saw "something" on my left ovary and wants me to come back in 4-6 weeks for a repeat u/s. Next week Monday I'm having a repeat HSG and I honestly don't have high hopes for it. I really think I have blocked tubes and that is the cause of my infertility, not the endo. But I found out Women's Speciality Care is one of the sites that I can have the monitoring done with that one program that covers 6 IVF cycles. Carmen said they deal with a lot of IVF clients who are in that program and have the egg retrieval and transfer done in IL or MN. so I'll probably go there for the monitoring (blood work and ultrasounds).
OK my kid and hubby are back so off to enjoy some family time before the kid goes to bed.
Friday, May 01, 2009
Friday Fill Ins
OK so Friday is almost over, but I'm still playing this fun game. The stuff highlighted in red is what I filled in.
1. The first rule of working in an office and getting along is mind your own business.
2. I don't eat clams.
3. When I think of carnivals I think of weird looking carnies.
4. Tulips are my favorite spring flower.
5. Things on my desk include pictures, post it notes, unorganized papers, phone, computer, hand sanitzer.
6. The fact that people are wearing masks at Walmart makes me wanna lose my mind.
7. And as for the weekend, tonight I'm looking forward to chilling out, tomorrow my plans include meeting Kristin and Dylan for some rummage saleing then taking Paige to YMCA Healthy Kids Day and Sunday, I am meeting high school friends for lunch in Appleton.
1. The first rule of working in an office and getting along is mind your own business.
2. I don't eat clams.
3. When I think of carnivals I think of weird looking carnies.
4. Tulips are my favorite spring flower.
5. Things on my desk include pictures, post it notes, unorganized papers, phone, computer, hand sanitzer.
6. The fact that people are wearing masks at Walmart makes me wanna lose my mind.
7. And as for the weekend, tonight I'm looking forward to chilling out, tomorrow my plans include meeting Kristin and Dylan for some rummage saleing then taking Paige to YMCA Healthy Kids Day and Sunday, I am meeting high school friends for lunch in Appleton.
Wednesday, April 29, 2009
Oink Oink
So you had to know this post was coming, right? And these words may come back to bite me in the ass, but please people STOP PANICKING!!!!! Do you realize that seasonal flu kills about 35,000 Americans EVERY YEAR?!?!? Honestly, I'd be a hell of a lot more worried about seasonal flu than swine flu. Did you get your flu shot? Did your kids get their flu shot? I read today that the seasonal flu has already killed 13,000 Americans this season. How many Americans has swine flu killed? Zero. The little boy that died in the US was from Mexico.
We have been preparing for a flu pandemic for years. We just thought it would be bird flu, not swine flu. Someone on FB is worried about delivering her child in a swine flu infested hospital. Please. Hospitals are so ready for this. My coworker's sister works for St. Vincent's and she's forwarded me a bunch of stuff that their infection control nurse sent to all of the staff there. And I think people with a contagious disease will be far far away from the nursery. Doctor's offices have been instructed to meet a person with flu like symptoms at the door wearing a mask, mask the patient and take them to an exam room. I would imagine hospitals will do the same.
The CDC said Wisconsin has one of the best pandemic flu plans. We are ready for this. Do not panic.
So what can you do? Number one, don't panic. Number two, be prepared for this outbreak to spread. Make sure you have a 2 week supply of food, water, prescription meds, cold and flu meds, and any special needs your family might have (diapers, baby food, formula, etc.). Most importantly and this won't sound like much, but it's HUGE: wash your hands, cover your cough, and stay home when you are sick. If your kid is sick, keep them home. If you go to church, don't shake hands with people who are coughing and sneezing. If you do, use hand sanitizer. Don't touch your eyes, nose or mouth. Do not stockpile masks. Do not stockpile antivirals. Save them for people in highly affected areas. I heard on the news tonight that several stores are out of masks.
I also just heard that WI has three probable swine flu cases. Let's put this in perspective. In one day, we got a call from one of our doctor's that 6 kids, 6, tested positive for influenza A in one day. And that's in one town of 4500 people.
Stepping off my soapbox now.
Tuesday, April 28, 2009
And So We Wait Some More
Got a call back from Carmen @ Women's Speciality Care who is an overall rock star and my new BFF. Dr. O'Toole reviewed my HSG films (Thank you Aurora for getting them there so quickly!) and wants me to have a repeat HSG. He says my left tube is definitely swollen and basically the radiologist, Dr. Gibson and Dr. Severino all had different opinions about the results. Great. In order to do the repeat HSG, Dr. O'Toole wants to be 100% sure I'm not pregnant, so we have to abstain for 2 weeks, then I have to have a pregnancy test the day before the HSG, and we'll do it on days 5-1o of my cycle. Kind of bummed about the 2 week abstaining because I've really enjoyed trying this cycle and have been looking forward to having sex just to have sex. What a concept. I'm going to still have my ultra sound next week because of my painful periods. I am just a mess. So if my tubes really are blocked, we are back to IVF.
I just found out a friend of a friend who has been trying for a while with no luck is pregnant. I'm really starting to feel like it will never happen for us.
Next week Monday I get my ingrown toenail removed and found out I have to wear the surgical shoe for up to 3 weeks. WTF?!?! I refuse to wear it to the Keith Urban show on the 16th. Mike is making fun of my vanity saying "so you'll have a better shot with him if you don't wear the shoe." I informed him that I'm saving myself for Kenny this summer. I'm rather pissy about my left heel because I've been wearing flip flops lately and it's been hurting like a mo'fo. If I really do have plantar faciitis that will suck the big one.
I was supposed to have car seat appointments today but my co worker offered to take my place. Thank god because the idiots that I work with decided rather than schedule people for other days, they would just start to schedule them before AND after our usual 2pm-5:45pm appointment times. It's bad enough doing car seats for over 4 hours straight, but those yahoos scheduled the first one at 11am and the last one at 6:15pm and she has 2 seats. I was super pissed about the 6:15pm one. I was gone almost all of last week, so I'd normally be busy just catching up. But add this swine flu BS in and I'm swamped. But I still make time to blog so my 5 readers aren't left hanging on the edge of their seats.
I just found out a friend of a friend who has been trying for a while with no luck is pregnant. I'm really starting to feel like it will never happen for us.
Next week Monday I get my ingrown toenail removed and found out I have to wear the surgical shoe for up to 3 weeks. WTF?!?! I refuse to wear it to the Keith Urban show on the 16th. Mike is making fun of my vanity saying "so you'll have a better shot with him if you don't wear the shoe." I informed him that I'm saving myself for Kenny this summer. I'm rather pissy about my left heel because I've been wearing flip flops lately and it's been hurting like a mo'fo. If I really do have plantar faciitis that will suck the big one.
I was supposed to have car seat appointments today but my co worker offered to take my place. Thank god because the idiots that I work with decided rather than schedule people for other days, they would just start to schedule them before AND after our usual 2pm-5:45pm appointment times. It's bad enough doing car seats for over 4 hours straight, but those yahoos scheduled the first one at 11am and the last one at 6:15pm and she has 2 seats. I was super pissed about the 6:15pm one. I was gone almost all of last week, so I'd normally be busy just catching up. But add this swine flu BS in and I'm swamped. But I still make time to blog so my 5 readers aren't left hanging on the edge of their seats.
Sunday, April 26, 2009
I Like My Small House But...
it does have it's drawbacks. For example, if Mike and I want some, um, adult time during the day we either have to ignore our burning loins or sneak to the basement for a quickie. We do this during Paige's "quiet time." Today our burning loins were not to be ignored. So we snuck to the basement and were in the throes of really enjoying ourselves when Mike jumps away from me like I have the plague and starts getting dressed. He must have supersonic ears because he heard Paige coming down the stairs. He caught Paige on the steps and explained that we were exercising and he got hot, which is why he had to take his shirt off. He stopped her before she got to the bottom step and saw me without my pants on. Luckily he got her back to her bedroom told her she had to stay in until the clock said 3 1 5 and we got back to business. I thought the kid would be a buzzkill but apparently not.
So last Tuesday was yet another round of "Losers Come Get Your Free Car Seats." Most of the parents were ok, but that fat chick who showed up at the car seat check in Oconto came again and got three more free seats. For whatever reason she doesn't drive so this time she came in her dad's car and we gave her three more free seats for his car. Why we couldn't have just given her a free convertible for the unborn baby and told her to move the boosters back and forth I don't know. My coworkers are hell bent on making sure every lazy schmuck gets a free car seat. Grandpa's car was a 1994 Mercury Sable. I'm not asking for much, but I'd just like a car from the 21st century. Our first vehicle was a 1996 Buick without LATCH and the grandpa attached the lower anchors from the car seat to "something" in the crack of the vehicle seat. Interesting. So we had a 1996 Buick, 1994 Mercury, 1998 Caravan, 1999 Silverado, and my 2 personal favorites a 1987 Toyota 4 runner and a 1994 Geo Tracker. The 1987 Toyota was a Hispanic family, dad spoke ok English, mom spoke almost none and their 7 year old daughter spoke the best English. They also had a 4 year old son. I spoke mostly to the 7 year old. She was super sweet and the family was very nice. So we were putting their boosters in the backseat and noticed they didn't have any shoulder belts. You absolutely cannot put a kid in a booster with lap belt only. Luckily my coworker asked if they had another car at home and they did. So they leave and pull up in a 1999 Cadillac Escalade with pimped out rims. Um, WTF? Why didn't you just show up in that? So they got their free boosters and we sent them on their way. The mom hugged us before they left. She was so sweet! Then our last one was the Tracker-a soft top with 2 kids in the back seat with no car seats. 7 year old girl and 3 year old boy. The boy was a huge brat who basically didn't talk, just screamed the whole time. Mom wasn't much better, she kept telling him that if he didn't stay in his seat that the cops would pull her over and take him away. Nothing like the threat of being taken away from your mom to calm down a hysterical 3 year old. Just a little awkward for us too.
I saw Dr. O'Toole to get my second opinion on Tuesday. I am very frustrated with how things are going right now. I have not been able to find a doctor that I stick with. I was seeing a doctor here in town, Dr. Hockman; she delivered Paige and also surgically removed the ovarian cyst I had about 4 years ago. She left and I saw the doctor who took her place (Dr. Bowers) a few times and liked her too, but I work with that office professionally and it just got to be weird seeing her on a personal basis. So then as you know I started seeing Dr. Gibson last fall and after the three rounds of Clomid and no pregnancy I went to Dr. Severino. I went to O'Toole to get a 2nd opinion on my HSG. Well I assumed Aurora was sending over the actual films from my HSG but they only sent over the notes. So Dr. O'Toole had nothing to look at, just Gibson and Severino's notes. UGH. So I had to call Gibson's office and have them send over a disc that has my HSG films to O'Toole. But because my ovarian cyst was endometriosis and I have painful periods (sorry if too much info) they are concerned that it's the endo causing my infertility. UGH! So I have low progesterone, possibly a damaged tube and endometriosis. No wonder I can't get pregnant. Dr. Bowers is sending all of my operative reports from my ovarian cyst removal also to O'Toole and he's going to review the films from my HSG. So I go back to Dr. O'Toole in 2 weeks to have an ultrasound done. I may need surgery to remove endo if I have any, and then he recommended clomid with IUI. My head is spinning. I just want a baby. I feel like I've seen every OB/GYN in GB in the last few years. I think I like Dr. O'Toole though. He's very confident, almost arrogant, but he knows his stuff. The clinic is like a 5 star hotel inside. Wow. I thought Aurora was nice. They have a fertility coordinator, Carmen, who is just a sweetheart. I like O'Toole because he's going to have as much of this stuff billed/coded as painful periods, not infertility because then it will more likely get paid by my insurance. I'm not too concerned about that because I've had every other infertility thing covered, but he mentioned several times that he wants to make sure I get the most out of my insurance coverage. A girl I work with has seen O'Toole for a while and said the same thing about him-very confident, but really knows his stuff. (copied and pasted from an email, much faster!)
We're watching reruns of the Cosby Show right now. They just don't make shows like this anymore.
So last Tuesday was yet another round of "Losers Come Get Your Free Car Seats." Most of the parents were ok, but that fat chick who showed up at the car seat check in Oconto came again and got three more free seats. For whatever reason she doesn't drive so this time she came in her dad's car and we gave her three more free seats for his car. Why we couldn't have just given her a free convertible for the unborn baby and told her to move the boosters back and forth I don't know. My coworkers are hell bent on making sure every lazy schmuck gets a free car seat. Grandpa's car was a 1994 Mercury Sable. I'm not asking for much, but I'd just like a car from the 21st century. Our first vehicle was a 1996 Buick without LATCH and the grandpa attached the lower anchors from the car seat to "something" in the crack of the vehicle seat. Interesting. So we had a 1996 Buick, 1994 Mercury, 1998 Caravan, 1999 Silverado, and my 2 personal favorites a 1987 Toyota 4 runner and a 1994 Geo Tracker. The 1987 Toyota was a Hispanic family, dad spoke ok English, mom spoke almost none and their 7 year old daughter spoke the best English. They also had a 4 year old son. I spoke mostly to the 7 year old. She was super sweet and the family was very nice. So we were putting their boosters in the backseat and noticed they didn't have any shoulder belts. You absolutely cannot put a kid in a booster with lap belt only. Luckily my coworker asked if they had another car at home and they did. So they leave and pull up in a 1999 Cadillac Escalade with pimped out rims. Um, WTF? Why didn't you just show up in that? So they got their free boosters and we sent them on their way. The mom hugged us before they left. She was so sweet! Then our last one was the Tracker-a soft top with 2 kids in the back seat with no car seats. 7 year old girl and 3 year old boy. The boy was a huge brat who basically didn't talk, just screamed the whole time. Mom wasn't much better, she kept telling him that if he didn't stay in his seat that the cops would pull her over and take him away. Nothing like the threat of being taken away from your mom to calm down a hysterical 3 year old. Just a little awkward for us too.
I saw Dr. O'Toole to get my second opinion on Tuesday. I am very frustrated with how things are going right now. I have not been able to find a doctor that I stick with. I was seeing a doctor here in town, Dr. Hockman; she delivered Paige and also surgically removed the ovarian cyst I had about 4 years ago. She left and I saw the doctor who took her place (Dr. Bowers) a few times and liked her too, but I work with that office professionally and it just got to be weird seeing her on a personal basis. So then as you know I started seeing Dr. Gibson last fall and after the three rounds of Clomid and no pregnancy I went to Dr. Severino. I went to O'Toole to get a 2nd opinion on my HSG. Well I assumed Aurora was sending over the actual films from my HSG but they only sent over the notes. So Dr. O'Toole had nothing to look at, just Gibson and Severino's notes. UGH. So I had to call Gibson's office and have them send over a disc that has my HSG films to O'Toole. But because my ovarian cyst was endometriosis and I have painful periods (sorry if too much info) they are concerned that it's the endo causing my infertility. UGH! So I have low progesterone, possibly a damaged tube and endometriosis. No wonder I can't get pregnant. Dr. Bowers is sending all of my operative reports from my ovarian cyst removal also to O'Toole and he's going to review the films from my HSG. So I go back to Dr. O'Toole in 2 weeks to have an ultrasound done. I may need surgery to remove endo if I have any, and then he recommended clomid with IUI. My head is spinning. I just want a baby. I feel like I've seen every OB/GYN in GB in the last few years. I think I like Dr. O'Toole though. He's very confident, almost arrogant, but he knows his stuff. The clinic is like a 5 star hotel inside. Wow. I thought Aurora was nice. They have a fertility coordinator, Carmen, who is just a sweetheart. I like O'Toole because he's going to have as much of this stuff billed/coded as painful periods, not infertility because then it will more likely get paid by my insurance. I'm not too concerned about that because I've had every other infertility thing covered, but he mentioned several times that he wants to make sure I get the most out of my insurance coverage. A girl I work with has seen O'Toole for a while and said the same thing about him-very confident, but really knows his stuff. (copied and pasted from an email, much faster!)
We're watching reruns of the Cosby Show right now. They just don't make shows like this anymore.
Friday, April 17, 2009
My List of 8's
Here's the deal--mention the person that tagged you. Complete the lists of 8's. Tag 8 of your wonderful blogger friends.
M of Rumblings and Bumblings tagged me. She's a fellow May 2004 Ya Ya and she rocks my socks off.
8 Things I Am Looking Forward To
1. Keith Urban concert next month
2. Brewer game in July
3. Kenny Chesney concert in July
4. Our school auction tomorrow night
5. Nice weather
6. My 8th wedding anniversary (not until October, but still something to look forward to!)
7. Paige riding her bike without training wheels
8. Tom and Kristin living closer to us
8 Things I Did Yesterday
1. Drove all the way to Wautoma of all places for a meeting
2. Shopped at Target
3. Totally splurged on a spring/fall super cute jacket at Target
4. Ate a ton of beer bread
5. Went to my first Tastefully Simple Party
6. Blogged
7. Facebooked
8. Skipped my workout
8 Things I Wish I Could Do
1. Get a new job. My coworkers suck.
2. Get pregnant.
3. Lose weight.
4. Get grass to grow and stay green in my yard.
5. Train my dog to not be so retarded.
6. Win the lottery.
7. Be more patient with Paige.
8. Make out with Kenny Chesney.
8 Shows I Watch
1. Desperate Housewives
2. American Idol
3. The Hills
4. Keeping Up with the Kardashians
5. 30 Minute Meals
6. Snapped
7. Law and Order
8. Friends
8 People I Tag
Um, if you're reading this and have a blog, I tag you.
M of Rumblings and Bumblings tagged me. She's a fellow May 2004 Ya Ya and she rocks my socks off.
8 Things I Am Looking Forward To
1. Keith Urban concert next month
2. Brewer game in July
3. Kenny Chesney concert in July
4. Our school auction tomorrow night
5. Nice weather
6. My 8th wedding anniversary (not until October, but still something to look forward to!)
7. Paige riding her bike without training wheels
8. Tom and Kristin living closer to us
8 Things I Did Yesterday
1. Drove all the way to Wautoma of all places for a meeting
2. Shopped at Target
3. Totally splurged on a spring/fall super cute jacket at Target
4. Ate a ton of beer bread
5. Went to my first Tastefully Simple Party
6. Blogged
7. Facebooked
8. Skipped my workout
8 Things I Wish I Could Do
1. Get a new job. My coworkers suck.
2. Get pregnant.
3. Lose weight.
4. Get grass to grow and stay green in my yard.
5. Train my dog to not be so retarded.
6. Win the lottery.
7. Be more patient with Paige.
8. Make out with Kenny Chesney.
8 Shows I Watch
1. Desperate Housewives
2. American Idol
3. The Hills
4. Keeping Up with the Kardashians
5. 30 Minute Meals
6. Snapped
7. Law and Order
8. Friends
8 People I Tag
Um, if you're reading this and have a blog, I tag you.
Thursday, April 16, 2009
I Work With Freaks
I like my job and what I actually do, but I cannot stand my coworkers. Yesterday, I had to make some copies; I get to the copier and it's jammed. Someone had a paper misfeed and rather than attempt to fix it or even put up a note saying "coper jammed" or asking someone for help with it, they just left it for the next person. I was in a huge hurry and our other few copiers are super slow. So I unjammed it. The copier gives you very specific instructions on how to fix it. You just have to be, oh I don't know, responsible for yourself and actually attempt something without someone else holding your hand. So I sent out a bitchy email to everyone saying please don't leave the copier jammed, fix it yourself or ask for help. Kind of sad I have to send that out to a group of adults.
Today one of the economic support workers emails all of us asking if someone took her correction tape. She needs it back because "she makes a mess with the liquid stuff and can't use it." SERIOUSLY?!?!?!!? You are a grown woman!!! My 4 year old would make a mess with liquid white out. You should not.
More car seat appointments yesterday. Our first one pulls up in a 1985 Buick. Yeah. Next car was a 1991 Oldsmobile. They were late because his meeting with his parole officer ran later. I'm sure you hear that excuse a lot. Next one was a no show. After that we had a 1998 Pontiac with a baby named Karma. Yep, Karma. Next one was in a 1993 Saturn with her super fat friend who barely fit in that car. Only the first family had a baby where the mom and baby had the same last name. I am so irritated that I even have to ask for the baby's last name and that 80% of the time it's different than mom's. All of them got their free car seats.
So while we're waiting for the no show (or maybe the one running late from his parole meeting) my co worker, who is our IMMUNIZATION COORDINATOR tells me she's pissed off at our boss for denying her vacation the first 2 weeks of October. October is flu clinic month. It has been for the last 100 years. Our immunization coordinator who coordinates flu clinics wants to take off during flu clinic month. And she's pissed off because our boss denied it.
I hope the economy improves soon so I can look for another job. I can't keep working with these yahoos.
Today one of the economic support workers emails all of us asking if someone took her correction tape. She needs it back because "she makes a mess with the liquid stuff and can't use it." SERIOUSLY?!?!?!!? You are a grown woman!!! My 4 year old would make a mess with liquid white out. You should not.
More car seat appointments yesterday. Our first one pulls up in a 1985 Buick. Yeah. Next car was a 1991 Oldsmobile. They were late because his meeting with his parole officer ran later. I'm sure you hear that excuse a lot. Next one was a no show. After that we had a 1998 Pontiac with a baby named Karma. Yep, Karma. Next one was in a 1993 Saturn with her super fat friend who barely fit in that car. Only the first family had a baby where the mom and baby had the same last name. I am so irritated that I even have to ask for the baby's last name and that 80% of the time it's different than mom's. All of them got their free car seats.
So while we're waiting for the no show (or maybe the one running late from his parole meeting) my co worker, who is our IMMUNIZATION COORDINATOR tells me she's pissed off at our boss for denying her vacation the first 2 weeks of October. October is flu clinic month. It has been for the last 100 years. Our immunization coordinator who coordinates flu clinics wants to take off during flu clinic month. And she's pissed off because our boss denied it.
I hope the economy improves soon so I can look for another job. I can't keep working with these yahoos.
Saturday, April 11, 2009
The Curls Are Definitely Gone
Paige got her hair cut yesterday into a super cute chin length bob. Alot of her friends have that kind of hair and she wanted it like that. It's absolutely adorable, but I'm still trying to wrap my mind around the fact that her curls are gone. She had the most adorable curls, but about a year ago they started to grow out. Everyone commented on her curls and I loved them! Here's the dramatic change:
To this:
Now granted there's about 2 1/2 years in between those pictures, but it gives you an idea of her curls. Now they are gone and in it's place is a stylish bob.
My baby will be 5 next month! 5 seems so old. She is growing up so fast. She's gotten so social and plays so well with lots of kids.
I'm now the proud new owner of a Motorola Rokr. YEAH!!!! I've been wanting a new phone for a while because my old one was a huge piece of shit. So I had it narrowed down to this LG with a slide out keyboard and the Rokr. I was leaning toward the LG because of the slide out keyboard and it was cheaper. Plus Motorolas never seem to hold their charge. So when I went to the the store today to get the new one, right away the girl working said many people return the LG's and don't really like them. So I ended up getting the Rokr and I really like it. I have the internet on it which is super cool. Mike is playing with it now.
Kristin and Tom are the proud new owners of a house in Sobieski. Their house payment will be twice ours. It's a beautiful home but I like my house payment. I'm excited to have them close to us.
I ran some errands in Green Bay today and of course spent too much money. Tell me how lame this is: Target had the green Leapster on sale for $29 but the pink one was the regular price of $49. We (well, I) want to get one for her birthday present. If I wouldn't have got a rain check for a $29 pink one from TRU, I would have just gotten her the pink one. I just think that is so lame. Stupid stores.
To this:
Now granted there's about 2 1/2 years in between those pictures, but it gives you an idea of her curls. Now they are gone and in it's place is a stylish bob.
My baby will be 5 next month! 5 seems so old. She is growing up so fast. She's gotten so social and plays so well with lots of kids.
I'm now the proud new owner of a Motorola Rokr. YEAH!!!! I've been wanting a new phone for a while because my old one was a huge piece of shit. So I had it narrowed down to this LG with a slide out keyboard and the Rokr. I was leaning toward the LG because of the slide out keyboard and it was cheaper. Plus Motorolas never seem to hold their charge. So when I went to the the store today to get the new one, right away the girl working said many people return the LG's and don't really like them. So I ended up getting the Rokr and I really like it. I have the internet on it which is super cool. Mike is playing with it now.
Kristin and Tom are the proud new owners of a house in Sobieski. Their house payment will be twice ours. It's a beautiful home but I like my house payment. I'm excited to have them close to us.
I ran some errands in Green Bay today and of course spent too much money. Tell me how lame this is: Target had the green Leapster on sale for $29 but the pink one was the regular price of $49. We (well, I) want to get one for her birthday present. If I wouldn't have got a rain check for a $29 pink one from TRU, I would have just gotten her the pink one. I just think that is so lame. Stupid stores.
Thursday, April 09, 2009
A Lesson in Kindness
Yesterday started badly. The night before last I was feeling pretty miserable and was still bummed yesterday morning. I slept in because I could not get out of bed. On my way into work I rear-ended a car. We were both at a stop sign, turning right, I looked left, didn't see anyone coming and started to accelerate without making
sure the car in front of me was going too. Well they weren't. Luckily it was a big ass Grand Marquis that must be made of steel because I didn't do any damage. I got out of my car, apologizing profusely and the lady looks at the car says she doesn't see anything, says it's ok, and got back in her car. She was so nice and really seemed to take pity on me. I got back into my car and started bawling. I so wanted to turn my car around and just go home, but I didn't. I totally could have turned left and taken off because they just sort of sat there at the stop sign, then turned right, pulled over and waited. So I waited for them. Maybe she was so nice because I didn't take off. I have no idea who she was, but I honestly felt like she was an angel. Maybe God put us in that situation to help me get my head out of my ass.
I've been really crabby and short with Paige today and I don't know why. I took today off because her sitter is closed (getting her wisdom teeth out) and for some reason she has really been irritating. Maybe there's something wrong with me. She's got some new annoying tricks-stomping her foot when she's mad about something, asking questions I just answered, and NOT LETTING ANYTHING DROP!!!! I can say no to something and she will not let it go until I've totally lost my patience and am yelling. Good times.
I'm looking into a program where we pay up front for IVF and get 3 "fresh" cycles and 3 frozen embryo transfers. If we don't get pregnant, we get either 70% to 100% of our money back depending on the clinic we go to. Only problem is, no clinics in Wisconsin participate. I'd have to go to Minnesota or Illinois for the egg retrieval and transfer. I can do the ultrasounds and bloodwork or what they call "monitoring" can be done at a clinic here in Green Bay. I have to find out if there's only certain clinics I can go to or if I can stick with Aurora. I'm not a fan of having to drive to Minneapolis or Highland Park, IL but I'll do it. I think IL would be closer and faster.
Paige has made a new friend in the older girl across the street. She wants to go over there every night and will keep asking if I say no. Tonight we were playing outside at our house and she saw this older girl outside at her house with some other girls. She drops the kite, yells "JEN IS OUTSIDE!!!!" and takes off towards her house, looking before she crossed the street. Um, ok. I guess you're going over there then? I watched her go, all the girls were waving at her and one gave her a hug when she got there. that made me feel better. The other girls are 7-9 years old. My theory is that they love to just play and really don't mind having Paige with. They came over here once and oohed and aahed over her kitchen and started playing with it right away. Then they all went outside and blew bubbles and drew with sidewalk chalk. So she's been there for almost an hour and I have to admit it's quite nice. I just don't want her to wear out her welcome.
sure the car in front of me was going too. Well they weren't. Luckily it was a big ass Grand Marquis that must be made of steel because I didn't do any damage. I got out of my car, apologizing profusely and the lady looks at the car says she doesn't see anything, says it's ok, and got back in her car. She was so nice and really seemed to take pity on me. I got back into my car and started bawling. I so wanted to turn my car around and just go home, but I didn't. I totally could have turned left and taken off because they just sort of sat there at the stop sign, then turned right, pulled over and waited. So I waited for them. Maybe she was so nice because I didn't take off. I have no idea who she was, but I honestly felt like she was an angel. Maybe God put us in that situation to help me get my head out of my ass.
I've been really crabby and short with Paige today and I don't know why. I took today off because her sitter is closed (getting her wisdom teeth out) and for some reason she has really been irritating. Maybe there's something wrong with me. She's got some new annoying tricks-stomping her foot when she's mad about something, asking questions I just answered, and NOT LETTING ANYTHING DROP!!!! I can say no to something and she will not let it go until I've totally lost my patience and am yelling. Good times.
I'm looking into a program where we pay up front for IVF and get 3 "fresh" cycles and 3 frozen embryo transfers. If we don't get pregnant, we get either 70% to 100% of our money back depending on the clinic we go to. Only problem is, no clinics in Wisconsin participate. I'd have to go to Minnesota or Illinois for the egg retrieval and transfer. I can do the ultrasounds and bloodwork or what they call "monitoring" can be done at a clinic here in Green Bay. I have to find out if there's only certain clinics I can go to or if I can stick with Aurora. I'm not a fan of having to drive to Minneapolis or Highland Park, IL but I'll do it. I think IL would be closer and faster.
Paige has made a new friend in the older girl across the street. She wants to go over there every night and will keep asking if I say no. Tonight we were playing outside at our house and she saw this older girl outside at her house with some other girls. She drops the kite, yells "JEN IS OUTSIDE!!!!" and takes off towards her house, looking before she crossed the street. Um, ok. I guess you're going over there then? I watched her go, all the girls were waving at her and one gave her a hug when she got there. that made me feel better. The other girls are 7-9 years old. My theory is that they love to just play and really don't mind having Paige with. They came over here once and oohed and aahed over her kitchen and started playing with it right away. Then they all went outside and blew bubbles and drew with sidewalk chalk. So she's been there for almost an hour and I have to admit it's quite nice. I just don't want her to wear out her welcome.
Tuesday, April 07, 2009
Forgot to Mention...
I found out today that I'm not pregnant. Yes my monthly visitor reared her ugly head. Good times.
I just drowned my sorrows in a half a bag of jelly beans. How healthy.
I am so tired tonight. I went to bed way too late last night and had such a hard tiem getting out of bed to exercise this morning. I bumbled my way through a strength training workout for about a half hour and then called it quits. I'm eating like crap lately, even worse than usual. I can tell I'm not losing weight and I should be.
Time for supper.
I just drowned my sorrows in a half a bag of jelly beans. How healthy.
I am so tired tonight. I went to bed way too late last night and had such a hard tiem getting out of bed to exercise this morning. I bumbled my way through a strength training workout for about a half hour and then called it quits. I'm eating like crap lately, even worse than usual. I can tell I'm not losing weight and I should be.
Time for supper.
Pity Party for Me
Those in my playgroup probably saw this coming, so you can stop reading now if you want. Another mom in the group, an aquaintence who I've always liked and wanted to get to know better, just announced on FB that she is pregnant. She has struggled for a while to get preggo and we were kind of in this "getting knocked up" journey together. Now I'm alone. Yes, I'm happy for her, I really am. But on the other hand, when I read that, it was like getting kicked in the stomach and going "WHY NOT ME?!?!!?" What am I doing wrong? What are we doing wrong? Or what have we done to deserve this?
I went to resolve.org, a really nice website dealing with all things infertility. They have message boards and I signed up for them. I can't activate my account until I check my yahoo email at home.
A few weeks ago, our CPS workers took a newborn baby out of her home, I don't know exactly why other than she was born with drugs in her system. Her loser parents came in every day for visitation for a few hours in the conference room RIGHT NEXT DOOR. They were always at least 10 minutes late, the "dad" once tested positive for pot in his system, and each have 5 kids with other people. They run a meth house and are in their mid 20's. Their worker has the office right across from mine so I overheard way too much and saw the baby way too much. I finally held her yesterday and she curled up like a little bean on my shoulder and fell asleep. I wanted to cry. I want to cry now typing this. Yesterday they had a court hearing and the biological parents got her back. Why? This poor baby will never have a chance.
I'm so frustrated that I have to wait almost a month before seeing Dr. O'Toole to get a second opinion. I'm going to call tomorrow and see if I can get anything sooner. I'm also going to ask that they get my records from Severino and that Dr. O'Toole reviews them prior to my appointment as I've been through all the initial stuff. I want him to look at the x-rays from my HSG and give me a definitive answer and whether or not he thinks it's worth my time and effort to have a repeat HSG. I've heard this clinic is wonderful, but I have a bad taste in my mouth from the way the receptionist treated me.
I went to resolve.org, a really nice website dealing with all things infertility. They have message boards and I signed up for them. I can't activate my account until I check my yahoo email at home.
A few weeks ago, our CPS workers took a newborn baby out of her home, I don't know exactly why other than she was born with drugs in her system. Her loser parents came in every day for visitation for a few hours in the conference room RIGHT NEXT DOOR. They were always at least 10 minutes late, the "dad" once tested positive for pot in his system, and each have 5 kids with other people. They run a meth house and are in their mid 20's. Their worker has the office right across from mine so I overheard way too much and saw the baby way too much. I finally held her yesterday and she curled up like a little bean on my shoulder and fell asleep. I wanted to cry. I want to cry now typing this. Yesterday they had a court hearing and the biological parents got her back. Why? This poor baby will never have a chance.
I'm so frustrated that I have to wait almost a month before seeing Dr. O'Toole to get a second opinion. I'm going to call tomorrow and see if I can get anything sooner. I'm also going to ask that they get my records from Severino and that Dr. O'Toole reviews them prior to my appointment as I've been through all the initial stuff. I want him to look at the x-rays from my HSG and give me a definitive answer and whether or not he thinks it's worth my time and effort to have a repeat HSG. I've heard this clinic is wonderful, but I have a bad taste in my mouth from the way the receptionist treated me.
Monday, April 06, 2009
"It Gets the Poop Off Better"
Yes, this statement actually came out of my mouth today. Paige was going number 2 and said "I'm going to use a baby wipe Mama!!!" I said "yeah, it gets the poop off better." As soon as I said it, I was like wow, the stuff that comes out of your mouth after you have kids....kind of crazy. Yes, I keep baby wipes out on my bathroom counter. They are just so darn practical. I've trained Paige to use the baby wipes when she poops otherwise we go through at least one roll of toilet paper a day. She has clogged the toilet with the insane amount of TP she uses.
So we had a nice weekend. Friday was a little rough. Paige was super tired and therefore super whiny and clingy and emotional. So I was more than happy to ship her off to school. Saturday we were lazy in the morning, then went to the Big Event for Little Kids at Shopko Hall. A loud crazy event, but Paige loved it! Then we met Kristin, her friend Megan and Dylan @ Margarita's. YUM. Mike went fishing (we drove separately) and Paige and I went to Kristin's for the rest of the night. I was a little worried about Paige getting jealous of Dylan, but she was so good. Kristin's friend Megan is really good with kids and gave lots of attention to Paige. Dylan is starting to smile and laugh more so he's even more fun to be around. He really seems to respond to Paige too and like her a lot. Mike finally rolled home around 3:30 am Sunday morning. The walleye fishing is really good on the Fox River and he's addicted. He's a good hubby though, he still got up on Sunday morning with Paige and let me sleep. Sunday we went to church, then Kristin and Tom came up because they were looking at houses in Little Suamico. Dylan of course was cuter than ever. Paige got him on a huge laughing fit and I recorded it on my camera. He played with Paige's old Gymini-what a blast from the past.
I think Kristin and Tom have their heads in the clouds. Kristin does not plan to go back to work full time, yet they are looking at houses that cost around $200,000. WTF. They found one they fell in love with that has vaulted ceilings, Corian counters, hickory cabinets, etc. It's not just a "basic house" like Tom said. I thought you mean, like ours? Like our 1040 square feet house with only one bathroom? It may not be much, but we can afford it and we can afford to do lots of fun things because we are not house poor.
Oh I forgot to mention the coolest part about the Big Event for Little Kids. As we walked up to the ticket counter to buy our tickets, this lady comes up to us and hands us four free tickets! SWEET!!! Saved us $22. Boy there were some "interesting" people there. Good people watching opportunities.
So we had a nice weekend. Friday was a little rough. Paige was super tired and therefore super whiny and clingy and emotional. So I was more than happy to ship her off to school. Saturday we were lazy in the morning, then went to the Big Event for Little Kids at Shopko Hall. A loud crazy event, but Paige loved it! Then we met Kristin, her friend Megan and Dylan @ Margarita's. YUM. Mike went fishing (we drove separately) and Paige and I went to Kristin's for the rest of the night. I was a little worried about Paige getting jealous of Dylan, but she was so good. Kristin's friend Megan is really good with kids and gave lots of attention to Paige. Dylan is starting to smile and laugh more so he's even more fun to be around. He really seems to respond to Paige too and like her a lot. Mike finally rolled home around 3:30 am Sunday morning. The walleye fishing is really good on the Fox River and he's addicted. He's a good hubby though, he still got up on Sunday morning with Paige and let me sleep. Sunday we went to church, then Kristin and Tom came up because they were looking at houses in Little Suamico. Dylan of course was cuter than ever. Paige got him on a huge laughing fit and I recorded it on my camera. He played with Paige's old Gymini-what a blast from the past.
I think Kristin and Tom have their heads in the clouds. Kristin does not plan to go back to work full time, yet they are looking at houses that cost around $200,000. WTF. They found one they fell in love with that has vaulted ceilings, Corian counters, hickory cabinets, etc. It's not just a "basic house" like Tom said. I thought you mean, like ours? Like our 1040 square feet house with only one bathroom? It may not be much, but we can afford it and we can afford to do lots of fun things because we are not house poor.
Oh I forgot to mention the coolest part about the Big Event for Little Kids. As we walked up to the ticket counter to buy our tickets, this lady comes up to us and hands us four free tickets! SWEET!!! Saved us $22. Boy there were some "interesting" people there. Good people watching opportunities.
Thursday, April 02, 2009
I Sound Like a Yooper
Holy crap, I just watched the video of me speaking to the Joint Finance Committee yesterday and I can't believe how strong my Wisconsin accent is. It's not even yooper-ish, I sound like I'm from northern Canada or something. Wowza. If you want a laugh at my expense, click http://wisconsineye.com/wisEye_programming/ARCHIVES-jointcommittees.html#1965
scroll down to 04.01.09 | Joint Committee on Finance Public Hearing from Appleton (Part 2) and click on "watch". I start at 32 minutes, 45 seconds. Yes, I took the time to figure that out. I think I also have a speech impediment, I said the word program and it comes out like "pwogram." WTF.
She-Devil testified, aka Carrie Schneider, the Outagamie County DA. She was the prosecutor in my dad's trial and her voice is worse than nail's on a chalkboard. If you've heard her before, you know. Try listening to it for 8-9 hours a day, 4 days in a row. It will drive you batty. As soon as she started talking, I flipped out and left. It was like a flashback to his trial. When I saw her on the news, she looks pregnant. I hope her kid rips her crotch to shreds with his/her devil horns on the way out.
The hearing was held at Lawrence University in downtown Appleton and downtowns really freak me out. I was overly prepared with a map of the downtown in which I drew the various parking ramps in. I memorized several routes of how I would get there. Well God had other plans for me because a bridge on College Avenue is closed from 441 and they direct you to take the Oneida St. exit. I had a panic attack realizing I may end up in Menasha or something. But I thankfully got there in one piece, the detour really wasn't that bad. I even got out of the parking ramp and back on Oneida GOING THE RIGHT WAY on my way home without having to turn around once. That's huge for me people. I sometimes have meetings in downtown GB in the same office building and I always use the same parking ramp. I still can't figure out how to get out of there and I've been going there for 8 years.
Well yah hey, I better get back to work, doncha think? Uff-da.
scroll down to 04.01.09 | Joint Committee on Finance Public Hearing from Appleton (Part 2) and click on "watch". I start at 32 minutes, 45 seconds. Yes, I took the time to figure that out. I think I also have a speech impediment, I said the word program and it comes out like "pwogram." WTF.
She-Devil testified, aka Carrie Schneider, the Outagamie County DA. She was the prosecutor in my dad's trial and her voice is worse than nail's on a chalkboard. If you've heard her before, you know. Try listening to it for 8-9 hours a day, 4 days in a row. It will drive you batty. As soon as she started talking, I flipped out and left. It was like a flashback to his trial. When I saw her on the news, she looks pregnant. I hope her kid rips her crotch to shreds with his/her devil horns on the way out.
The hearing was held at Lawrence University in downtown Appleton and downtowns really freak me out. I was overly prepared with a map of the downtown in which I drew the various parking ramps in. I memorized several routes of how I would get there. Well God had other plans for me because a bridge on College Avenue is closed from 441 and they direct you to take the Oneida St. exit. I had a panic attack realizing I may end up in Menasha or something. But I thankfully got there in one piece, the detour really wasn't that bad. I even got out of the parking ramp and back on Oneida GOING THE RIGHT WAY on my way home without having to turn around once. That's huge for me people. I sometimes have meetings in downtown GB in the same office building and I always use the same parking ramp. I still can't figure out how to get out of there and I've been going there for 8 years.
Well yah hey, I better get back to work, doncha think? Uff-da.
Tuesday, March 31, 2009
Long Day Ahead
Tomorrow is a public hearing for the Joint Finance Committee of our totally awesome state legislature in Appleton. Why would I care about that? Well, there are three tobacco related items in Governor Doyle's budget: an increased cigarette tax, smoke free air in all public buildings in WI, and a $1.8 million dollar cut to the tobacco prevention program statewide. Of course, I support the first 2, but not the 2nd. So all of us local pee-ons are pretty much being bullied into attending and making sure you bring others from your area to speak and if you can't then they should at least bring written testimony. So I begged and pleaded and got 5 written testimonies-pretty good I think. The best one is from the owner of a golf course up here. When he and his wife took it over 2 years ago, they ran it as a smoke free place and are the only smoke free bar in Oconto. Unfortunately, he emailed me his testimony after I left work. Luckily I can check my work email from home, so I had to print 20 copies of it (one for each of the 16 committee members and extras) on my home printer. We're out of black toner, so I had to use color. Ouch.
So I have to leave at 7am tomorrow to get to the hearing by 8-8:30am. It's at Lawrence University in downtown Appleton and I get freaked out in downtowns. I have to park in a ramp, and I always forget where I park and then to remember which way to go...yikes. I don't think I'm going to stay all day. I'll sign in, drop off my testimony and see how long my wait will be. The hearing doesn't start until 10am, but we're under strict orders from the powers that be to get there at least 90 minutes early. If it looks like I'll speak before lunch, I'll stay. If not, I'll go because I have a shitpile of stuff at work to do.
Another thing I have to do tomorrow is enter an enrollment for the women's health program I coordinate into our online system. I have to do that before I leave. This woman's income was just over the current guidelines, but they change tomorrow, April 1st. Well she called today and said she has her Pap and mammogram tomorrow, so she absolutely has to be enrolled on or before tomorrow. Well I can't enroll her today, so I had to bring her enrollment form home with me and I'll have to enter it in tomorrow.
And I want to go to a restaurant tomorrow night with my mom's group. It's a place I've never been to before and it sounds yummy. But I'm afraid I might be shot. We'll see.
For this, I'm paid $15,000-$20,000 less than the public health nurses that sit on their asses. Oh yeah, our salaries are public record and I saw what my coworkers make. I just about died. Our Human Services Director makes $93,000 to stumble in hungover almost every day and work from 10am-2pm. Swell.
Paige has an all day retreat at a church about 5 miles away from here tomorrow. The whole school is going and she is beside herself with excitement. She wanted me to pack a lunch and I panicked realizing tonight she doesn't have a lunch bag. So we head up to the Family Dollar in the pouring ran and luckily they had some lunch bags. We lucked out too, I don't think they normally carry them, but they were in this summer/picnic display. PHEW. That is all she talked about tonight-what she was going to have for lunch and her retreat tomorrow. So cute.
I got in to Women's Speciality Care on April 21st with Dr. O'Toole. I hope I don't have to wait a while for the HSG. I felt like such a retard calling to make the appointment. I launched into this monologue because I didn't know how much information the receptionist needed and she kept cutting me off. She was rather rude so I am already a little hesitant about this place. The receptionists are the first line of contact with patients and potential patients and can really set the tone. But I have several friends that go there, so I need to stay optomistic. I just didn't think I'd have to wait that long. I got the impression from the receptionist that I really wasn't a priority. She said rather snottily that I'd need a consult and that it would be at least a month. She just announced a time without checking to see if it would work with my schedule. Minor stuff, but it irritates me.
So I have to leave at 7am tomorrow to get to the hearing by 8-8:30am. It's at Lawrence University in downtown Appleton and I get freaked out in downtowns. I have to park in a ramp, and I always forget where I park and then to remember which way to go...yikes. I don't think I'm going to stay all day. I'll sign in, drop off my testimony and see how long my wait will be. The hearing doesn't start until 10am, but we're under strict orders from the powers that be to get there at least 90 minutes early. If it looks like I'll speak before lunch, I'll stay. If not, I'll go because I have a shitpile of stuff at work to do.
Another thing I have to do tomorrow is enter an enrollment for the women's health program I coordinate into our online system. I have to do that before I leave. This woman's income was just over the current guidelines, but they change tomorrow, April 1st. Well she called today and said she has her Pap and mammogram tomorrow, so she absolutely has to be enrolled on or before tomorrow. Well I can't enroll her today, so I had to bring her enrollment form home with me and I'll have to enter it in tomorrow.
And I want to go to a restaurant tomorrow night with my mom's group. It's a place I've never been to before and it sounds yummy. But I'm afraid I might be shot. We'll see.
For this, I'm paid $15,000-$20,000 less than the public health nurses that sit on their asses. Oh yeah, our salaries are public record and I saw what my coworkers make. I just about died. Our Human Services Director makes $93,000 to stumble in hungover almost every day and work from 10am-2pm. Swell.
Paige has an all day retreat at a church about 5 miles away from here tomorrow. The whole school is going and she is beside herself with excitement. She wanted me to pack a lunch and I panicked realizing tonight she doesn't have a lunch bag. So we head up to the Family Dollar in the pouring ran and luckily they had some lunch bags. We lucked out too, I don't think they normally carry them, but they were in this summer/picnic display. PHEW. That is all she talked about tonight-what she was going to have for lunch and her retreat tomorrow. So cute.
I got in to Women's Speciality Care on April 21st with Dr. O'Toole. I hope I don't have to wait a while for the HSG. I felt like such a retard calling to make the appointment. I launched into this monologue because I didn't know how much information the receptionist needed and she kept cutting me off. She was rather rude so I am already a little hesitant about this place. The receptionists are the first line of contact with patients and potential patients and can really set the tone. But I have several friends that go there, so I need to stay optomistic. I just didn't think I'd have to wait that long. I got the impression from the receptionist that I really wasn't a priority. She said rather snottily that I'd need a consult and that it would be at least a month. She just announced a time without checking to see if it would work with my schedule. Minor stuff, but it irritates me.
Monday, March 30, 2009
Entertaining Stories
I worked at a car seat check on Saturday in Oconto and I know you all have been hanging on the edge of your seats waiting for me to post my entertaining stories. Well, here goes.
At around 8:45 am, a coworker and I are attempting to put up this huge ass sign by the side of the road that says "free car seat check here" when this fat chick pulls up in a huge piece of shit car and says "is this where I get my free car seat because I'm on WIC?" Seriously? Does no one have any dignity any more? The check started at nine and you must know that a huge pet peeve of mine is when people come early for car seat appointments. The appointment is for 2pm, not 1:50pm. There's a difference. I know it's exciting because you're getting free shit, but hold your horses. So I was slightly rude to her and said "well the event starts at 9am, and it will be in the body shop over there." I walk away and continue to wrestle with this huge ass sign in 50 mph winds. When it was up, I go back to the body shop and see fattie fatterson and her husband sitting inside the garage waiting for us to start. It is still not 9am by this point and I'm already po'd. Unfortunately I get stuck with her and she proceeds to tell me that she has a 6 year old (who is not there), a 4 year old (a homely fat child) and #3 due in 2 weeks. The older 2 are in boosters that she paid $1 for at a rummage sale. "I couldn't pass them up" she says. Ok, so your kids are worth $1 a piece, got it. Right away, I'm praying that we can get three car seats in the back seat of this car. It was a Jetta that had to have been from the 80's. The backseat was full of shit and I made the dad clean up all the crap that was on the floor of the car. We literally would not have been able to stand on the floor of the backseat, it was that full of crap. Once I got in the backseat, I wanted to cry. It was awful. Crumbs, shoes, socks, etc. It doesn't sound bad, but it was just disgusting. I was honestly afraid to touch anything. Oh yeah and the mom was still wearing her pajamas. Honestly. So this deadbeat mom and dad got three free car seats from us, and luckily they all fit in the backseat.
My second vehicle was a grandma who really had no business driving. She couldn't pull into one of our slots because she "couldn't steer." Oh, ok. So she sort of just pulled in and we had to somehow arrange the other cars around her. She had her 11 month old granddaughter with her still in the infant seat, the straps were completely off her shoulders and it was in super loose. She needed a new free seat because her daughter was due with #2 in a few weeks and needed the infant seat for baby #2. Sure, let's just keep popping babies out. She was pretty nice, but was definitely not the sharpest knife in the drawer.
The last one wasn't so bad. A really nice mom with a fairly well behaved kid. The only thing was his name was Colton which I really hate. When I asked how to spell it, she said Koltyn. Why? Really, why are we doing this to our kids?
So my mom made me cry tonight. I was on my way to my friend Lisa's house for supper and she called. She asked how my appointment went on Friday and I said not good and told her why. So she launched into her "IVF is evil" monologue and really pissed me off. I said something about Kristin living with Tom before they were married and she said she didn't like that either. Whatever. I very clearly remember her saying she didn't like it, but Kristin "doesn't do well alone." UGH. So I told my mom that we are going to have another child somehow and if we go the IVF route, I'm not telling her. Sounds immature, but I'm so pissed about this.
On that note, I've decided to get a 2nd opinion. I'm going to call Women's Speciality Care and ask to have another HSG. I just don't understand how Dr. Gibson could have not seen any problems with my HSG and Dr. Severino said the dye spill was sluggish and that I have swollen tubes. Dr. Severino never mentioned anything about possibly repairing my tubes. On the Women's Speciality Care website, they mention surgery to repair the tubes if there is a good chance to restore fertility.
My friends rock! I had a ton of responses to when I posted on FB what happened on Friday. I knew I had good friends, but it's nice to know just how much people care. Thanks guys!!!
At around 8:45 am, a coworker and I are attempting to put up this huge ass sign by the side of the road that says "free car seat check here" when this fat chick pulls up in a huge piece of shit car and says "is this where I get my free car seat because I'm on WIC?" Seriously? Does no one have any dignity any more? The check started at nine and you must know that a huge pet peeve of mine is when people come early for car seat appointments. The appointment is for 2pm, not 1:50pm. There's a difference. I know it's exciting because you're getting free shit, but hold your horses. So I was slightly rude to her and said "well the event starts at 9am, and it will be in the body shop over there." I walk away and continue to wrestle with this huge ass sign in 50 mph winds. When it was up, I go back to the body shop and see fattie fatterson and her husband sitting inside the garage waiting for us to start. It is still not 9am by this point and I'm already po'd. Unfortunately I get stuck with her and she proceeds to tell me that she has a 6 year old (who is not there), a 4 year old (a homely fat child) and #3 due in 2 weeks. The older 2 are in boosters that she paid $1 for at a rummage sale. "I couldn't pass them up" she says. Ok, so your kids are worth $1 a piece, got it. Right away, I'm praying that we can get three car seats in the back seat of this car. It was a Jetta that had to have been from the 80's. The backseat was full of shit and I made the dad clean up all the crap that was on the floor of the car. We literally would not have been able to stand on the floor of the backseat, it was that full of crap. Once I got in the backseat, I wanted to cry. It was awful. Crumbs, shoes, socks, etc. It doesn't sound bad, but it was just disgusting. I was honestly afraid to touch anything. Oh yeah and the mom was still wearing her pajamas. Honestly. So this deadbeat mom and dad got three free car seats from us, and luckily they all fit in the backseat.
My second vehicle was a grandma who really had no business driving. She couldn't pull into one of our slots because she "couldn't steer." Oh, ok. So she sort of just pulled in and we had to somehow arrange the other cars around her. She had her 11 month old granddaughter with her still in the infant seat, the straps were completely off her shoulders and it was in super loose. She needed a new free seat because her daughter was due with #2 in a few weeks and needed the infant seat for baby #2. Sure, let's just keep popping babies out. She was pretty nice, but was definitely not the sharpest knife in the drawer.
The last one wasn't so bad. A really nice mom with a fairly well behaved kid. The only thing was his name was Colton which I really hate. When I asked how to spell it, she said Koltyn. Why? Really, why are we doing this to our kids?
So my mom made me cry tonight. I was on my way to my friend Lisa's house for supper and she called. She asked how my appointment went on Friday and I said not good and told her why. So she launched into her "IVF is evil" monologue and really pissed me off. I said something about Kristin living with Tom before they were married and she said she didn't like that either. Whatever. I very clearly remember her saying she didn't like it, but Kristin "doesn't do well alone." UGH. So I told my mom that we are going to have another child somehow and if we go the IVF route, I'm not telling her. Sounds immature, but I'm so pissed about this.
On that note, I've decided to get a 2nd opinion. I'm going to call Women's Speciality Care and ask to have another HSG. I just don't understand how Dr. Gibson could have not seen any problems with my HSG and Dr. Severino said the dye spill was sluggish and that I have swollen tubes. Dr. Severino never mentioned anything about possibly repairing my tubes. On the Women's Speciality Care website, they mention surgery to repair the tubes if there is a good chance to restore fertility.
My friends rock! I had a ton of responses to when I posted on FB what happened on Friday. I knew I had good friends, but it's nice to know just how much people care. Thanks guys!!!
Friday, March 27, 2009
In a Daze
I had a follow up appointment with Dr. Severino today. He came right out and said that our best option is IVF. He reviewed my HSG and said the dye was sluggish going through my tubes. It didn't spill out freely like it should have. I don't know why Dr. Gibson see that, but whatever. They don't know why my tubes are swollen, but they are. I may have had some sort of infection that damaged them. I have a feeling it was caused by my ovarian cyst that was endometriosis. So IUI won't really help us that much because my eggs may not be coming down my tubes to be ready for Mike's swimmers.
IVF is really the best option because it completely bypasses the tubes. The main problem with it is that my insurance doesn't cover it. It costs around $15,000. The success rate is about 52%. I thought briefly about asking my grandma to lend the money to us, but then I remembered that the Catholic church is opposed to IVF and my whole family is super Catholic so that probably won't fly. My parents don't have the money to lend to us and probably wouldn't even if they had. I highly doubt anyone in Mike's family has it for us to borrow. It's also a huge time committment. I would have to go there quite frequently for ultrasounds and blood work, plus give myself injections. I'm ok with all of that and luckily my boss is very flexible. She had infertility issues too so she would know what I'm going through. Right now we have about $300 each left to pay Aurora for my HSG and the chiropracter from Mike's back this past summer. We also have about $2400 left on a CC that paid for our new furnace and car repairs last November. I'm thinking once those are paid off, we can start to save for a part of this. Maybe I can persuade Mike to sell the truck too. I'm even thinking of having a rummage sale this summer. I could make a lot of money from all of Paige's toys and clothes. Maybe we can get $5000-$7500 saved up and put the rest on a low interest CC. Luckily we have really good credit, so getting a low interest CC shouldn't be a problem. We could only do IVF once. If it doesn't work, I don't know what to do. Maybe we'll consider adoption. Again I'm just in a daze. I just can't resign myself to the idea that Paige will be an only child. She is made to be a big sister.
IVF is really the best option because it completely bypasses the tubes. The main problem with it is that my insurance doesn't cover it. It costs around $15,000. The success rate is about 52%. I thought briefly about asking my grandma to lend the money to us, but then I remembered that the Catholic church is opposed to IVF and my whole family is super Catholic so that probably won't fly. My parents don't have the money to lend to us and probably wouldn't even if they had. I highly doubt anyone in Mike's family has it for us to borrow. It's also a huge time committment. I would have to go there quite frequently for ultrasounds and blood work, plus give myself injections. I'm ok with all of that and luckily my boss is very flexible. She had infertility issues too so she would know what I'm going through. Right now we have about $300 each left to pay Aurora for my HSG and the chiropracter from Mike's back this past summer. We also have about $2400 left on a CC that paid for our new furnace and car repairs last November. I'm thinking once those are paid off, we can start to save for a part of this. Maybe I can persuade Mike to sell the truck too. I'm even thinking of having a rummage sale this summer. I could make a lot of money from all of Paige's toys and clothes. Maybe we can get $5000-$7500 saved up and put the rest on a low interest CC. Luckily we have really good credit, so getting a low interest CC shouldn't be a problem. We could only do IVF once. If it doesn't work, I don't know what to do. Maybe we'll consider adoption. Again I'm just in a daze. I just can't resign myself to the idea that Paige will be an only child. She is made to be a big sister.
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