In Laws Suck

So I have been a bitch on wheels this week. My period is just kicking my ass.

Today I'm at work and Mike calls. He goes "well the good news is..." he switched with someone at work so he has the Friday off that we're going to the Kalahari. So there's bad news. Bad news is that his stepsister who lives in GB, her car broke down and his dad, Mechanic to the Rescue, decides to drive from Hayward and use our garage to fix it. Oh and spend the night. The rage is building inside of me as I type this. So he's either on his way or already at our house right now and I'm not there. I hate that. He is going to be home tonight when Paige and I get home. I hate that too. Mike works until 8pm so I have almost 4 hours alone with him and his wife. My house is dirty right now and the back bedroom is in it's usual state of disarray. I told Mike I refuse to cook for them, and I refuse to touch the back bedroom. Oh the rage, it's still building. Good man that he is, he took my ranting and raving and agreed with everything I said, and also that he would clean out the back bedroom and tell them not to put anything in there until he got home to clean it out.

So then Mike proceeds to tell me that someone is coming over tonight to look at the night vision goggles he has listed on CL. Oh great. I have someone coming over at 5pm to buy Paige's wagon. It's going to be a circus at my house. So I'll have the in laws, random stranger buying the wagon at 5pm, in laws until 8:15pm, Mike home, than another random stranger to buy night vision goggles around 8:30pm. WTF?!?!?!

So here are my questions. The stepsister will graduate from college next month. Isn't it time for her to be a grown up and take care of this herself? Can't they stay at her house? Mike's explanation for this is that his dad likes to see Paige. WHAT?!?! The man sits in my chair and keeps telling Paige to come up and sit on his lap. He doesn't play games with her, he doesn't color or do playdoh with her, he doesn't play baseball, push her on the swing set or do sidewalk chalk with her. Does he honestly think sitting in my chair with her on his lap for 30 seconds is quality time?

I'm so insanely jealous of my BFF, who's divorced and lives with her almost 7 year old daughter and 3 cats. Yes 3, don't judge her. She had 2, but became very close to her neighbor who died very suddenly last fall and took in her cat. She gets to go home to a quiet, in-law free house.

Sometimes being married just plain sucks sometimes.

The Winter Olympics are Weird

I sit here watching 2 German woman in a plastic sled with wheels hurtle themselves down a tunnel of ice going around 90 mph. That's a sport? Really? As I type, they crashed and one of the German women was ejected and flopping around on the tunnel of ice like a ragdoll. Like who ever goes, hey friend, let's get a sled on wheels, stand at the top of a tunnel of ice, we both run, you get in the back seat and duck your head and let's hurtle ourselves down this tunnel of ice at 90 mph. Apparently it's a sport. Yeah, it really is. And let's do this over and over for years and maybe we can do this in front of millions of people at the Olympics.

Or does one decide, I don't need that loser. I'm going to go headfirst on a piece of equipment they call a skeleton on a tunnel of ice. And I'll wear a helmet because that will TOTALLY protect me.

Curling?!?! Really? Whose brainchild was this? Let's take brooms and sweep them around a puck looking thing and make it move, kind of like shuffleboard but on ice.

And who invented moguls? Hitler? It makes my body hurt just watching it.

The biathalon. Let's ski and then shoot stuff. Or is it the other way around? Pretty soon they are going to have the participants shoot stuff while skiing. Maybe the freestyle arial skiers could start shooting stuff. That would pep up that sport a tad.

Today I briefly watched a cross country ski marathon. I think it was 24 miles. That makes me tired just thinking about it.

I will say I haven't watched much skiiing but I'm really sick of Lindsey Vonn. Yes she is blonde and beautiful. But really when her teammate falls on the ski hill, I could give 2 shits about Lindsey's reaction. Stop showing her all the time because she is a beautiful blonde.

Someone they can keep showing is Apolo Ohno. I've developed a crush.

Oh Come ON!!!

So yesterday I go into Women's Speciality Care for an ultrasound to check on my ovaries to see if they are still housing some cysts. I made the appointment last Friday with their infertility coordinator (who rocks my socks off, btw) for 10:30am yesterday, and she tells me I will see Dr. O'Toole (who I have affectionately named Dr. Wonderful) afterwards. She also tells me to bring a book or something because it could be a long wait for him. I've done this once before (u/s followed by an apt. with Dr. Wonderful), so I knew to come prepared. I'm reading a book that I'm totally digging (Goodnight Nobody by Jennifer Weiner) and so I brought that and my latest Redbook. I'm classy.

So on Tuesday I have a message from Dr. Wonderful's office reminding me of my 11:15am with him. I call back to make sure they have me scheduled for the u/s at 10:30am and they do. So I'm thinking, SWEET!!!!! 10:30am u/s, apt. with Dr. Wonderful at 11:15am and I'm outta here. Yeah, no. Dr. Wonderful did not grace me with his presence until 12:40pm. And it took all of 5 minutes.

I should have known better because I heard a patient ask if Dr. O'Toole was running on time, and the staff actually had the nerve to say yes. That was my first red flag. Then a very pregnant woman who was also in the waiting room got called just before I did (around noon-ish) and tells me she also had an 11:15am with Dr. Wonderful. AGH!!!!!

So here's the where the Oh Come ON part comes in. I'm getting the ultrasound and not only are my cysts gone, but apparently my follicles are just ripe for the picking. They look better than they ever did when I was on clomid. Seriously?!?!?! But then Dr. Wonderful tells me later on that I most likely have endometriosis because my periods are insanely heavy (picture floodgates opening up) and 3 aleve just barely take the edge of my cramps. So if I want to do something about the endo, he told me to come back and we can discuss my options. Most likely I'd start with BC pills.

Ok, so we've accepted that we are going to have one, and are even starting to embrace it. Now my body is saying, hey I could get pregnant, but maybe not, and you should go on BC to manage the endo.

So I'm all steamed in the exam room waiting for Dr. Wonderful and he comes in and charms me. You can't help but like him. It's so annoying. But I've been seeing Dr. Gibson for my paps and that lovely stuff, so I think I'm just going to stick with him. I don't have to worry waiting for him for almost and hour and a half. Plus a good friend of mine used to be his nurse, so I like to think he's a little extra nice to me. And he's the doctor that prescribes my lexapro, don't want to mess with that.

We're One and Done

So my 14 readers, are you excited to see a new blog post?!?!? I know, I know.

So last time we were together, this blog could be summed up like this "Paige drives me crazy-I can't get pregnant-my coworkers suck-I can't get pregnant-Paige is driving me CRAZY!!!!-my coworkers still suck-Mike is driving me CRAZY!!!!-I can't get pregnant-I can't get pregnant, etc." Mike still drives me crazy, but I love that man so much. Paige will always drive me crazy, but I love her so much it hurts. My coworkers still suck and well, they always will. I can't get pregnant-yeah, we're done with that.

Basically I am the reason why we can't get pregnant. Mike has "wall of fame" sperm-a nurse at Dr. Severino's office words, not mine. I have weird tubes and ovarian cysts. So after months of clomid, ultrasound, bc pills to shrink the cysts, peeing on a stick, IUI that all failed, just reinforcing the fact that I'm the reason why we're not getting pregnant, we are done. Paige asked once for a brother or sister and Mike and I quickly explained that we fought with our siblings all the time growing up (did NOT have to make that up, BTW), she quickly dropped it. The few times I've been with her and babysitting Dylan, she has not been a fan of sharing my attention with Dylan. And to be brutally honest, I don't think I would be a good mother of more than one child. I get frazzled too easily. Yes, it's hard looking back at Paige's baby and toddler pictures knowing I will never get to do that again, but is that a good enough reason to have another baby?

Adoption was not an option for us. Call me selfish or whatever you want, but after carrying and delivering my own child, I wanted to do that again. IVF was not an option either for financial and ethical reasons.

So we have our sweet Paige and the sun will continue to rise and set on her in our (and her!) eyes. She is well liked, well behaved, is becoming more social and has lots of friends. Why mess with that?

Mike took a new job earlier this year that pays nearly $4 an hour less than his old job, with no overtime. So we are taking a HUGE financial hit, but because I truly believe we are able to do that because Paige is an only child. We can still afford Catholic school, camping, water park trips (2 in April!!!), a Badger Bouncers birthday party, Disney on Ice, and other fun stuff. He's working with mentally handicapped adults in their homes. No more delivery driver! No more sore back, driving for hours a day in the snow, etc.

Having an only child is right for our family. I do not want to bash families with more than one child, it's just not right for us.