I don't know what's going on with me the past few days. I honestly feel like I need to increase my happy pill dosage. I don't want to be at work and am doing as much as I can to not be there-sleeping late, setting up dr. apts. this week (they are legit one eye apt. and one podiatrist apt.), coming home after a car seat apt. to make phone calls, etc. When I'm there, I do piddly putzy stuff or dink around on the internet. I'm keeping candy in one of my drawers and eating it constantly. Can we say emotional eating? I'm snapping at Mike and feel like the world's biggest bitch to him. In a nutshell, I just feel blue.
Tonight for example was extremely stressful. It was Paige's school Christmas play. It started at 6pm and we were told to get there 15 minutes early. So we pull in at 5:45pm and the parking lot is full. WTF?!?!? The school and church are connected and the play is going on in the church. We walk in to the church and it's packed. Again, WTF?!?!? Did a different note go out saying get there at 5:30 pm? Shit like that really stresses me out. So Mike goes to get us a seat and I take Paige back to her classroom to get her costume on. As we walk through the school, I see that pretty much every other kid is all dressed and ready to go. At this point, I'm feeling like the world's biggest loser. Also we pass a few parents and no one says hello. I'm feeling very left out and I hate that feeling. So I get Paige into her costume and walk back out by Mike. We were also asked to bring some snacks for a social afterwards and I'm still carrying these stupid treats I brought. Not one parent told me where to bring the food. It's our first year at this school and we have no idea what's going on. Finally we get back to our seats and I see some of the parents and siblings are all dressed up and everyone has these red programs. UGH! Why are we so retarded? We're wearing jeans and tennies. So I tell Mike I'm about ready to have a nervous breakdown for all of these reasons. He's so good. He tells me not to worry about it and stays by me for a few minutes. Then he gets up and asks someone where to take the treats and where to get the programs. He never once made fun of me or made me feel bad. That is why I love this man. He puts up with my weird neurotic shit. Once the play started, I finally relaxed. Paige did great, she remembered her line and sang all the words to the songs she was supposed to. She was so cute!
At the "social" we sat by some people to try to get to know them and they basically ignored us. It's so hard to break into this town. I guess we just have to give it time.
2 comments:
It must be a Catholic school thing. People here start showing up an hour before the thing is supposed to start to get the "good seats" and get all their freaking camera equipment set up.
I didn't talk to many parents when Lex was in preschool and even into Kindergarten, but now our kids have been in the same class 4 years (only one class per grade) and we're all friends. Just give it some time.
I'm glad Mike was there for you. I hope you're feeling better today.
(((Hugs)))
Hey, sorry you're feeling blue, all I have to say is chlomid. Feeling blue can be a side affect of it and it may get worse if you are upping your dose. Just keep your head up and I'm glad Mike is so supportive. Sorry the parents at your school are jerks. Ian's pre-K class is kinda the same. It's a church school and most of the kids that are in his class go to church there, but we don't. They are all friends and it has taken him a long time to break into the clicks and find a few friends. Luckily for me I know a lot of the parents from high school so it hasn't been too hard to socialize at events, just hard for Ian.
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